


When Louis met Liam

by Ikidd



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: F/M, M/M, When Harry met Sally!au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-07
Updated: 2015-11-27
Packaged: 2018-04-30 11:00:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 22,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5161259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ikidd/pseuds/Ikidd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You do realize that two gay men can’t be friends, right?”</p>
<p>“What? No, Why?” That is the dumbest thing he’s heard, is like saying man and woman can’t be friends.</p>
<p>“Because sex always gets in the way” Louis says like is the most obvious thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Well hello there. Here's this thing again, after two year of hiatus. The truth is that I was too busy finishing college and hey I'm a fucking architect now!! And tbh around 2013 I started not liking Liam or Louis all that much so I didn't saw the point of writing them but this year lilo become so real and so amazing and i started loving them again that i read this mess of a thing and remembered how i wanted to end it so here it is.
> 
> An easy When Harry met Sally au with Louis as Harry and Liam as Sally.

The first time Liam met Louis he’s just some guy with a really nice ass and he can’t even see his face. He has his leg wrap around Aiden Grimshaw and his tongue deep Aiden Grimshaw’s throat. If they weren’t outside Aiden’s flat, Liam is sure; he would have his balls deep inside Aiden Grimshaw’s ass. They’ve been going at it for like five minutes, so Liam clears his throat.

He doesn’t have anything against PDA but he would like to get to London somewhere between today and The Judgment Day and if Louis keeps that hip movement, it won’t happen. Luckily Aiden pulls apart and Louis, more reluctant, does too. Aiden has this glassy look on his face. It could be love, but Liam is convinced that with glasses it could be fixed. He watches The X-Factor with the same look and he hasn’t been dating Louis for more than a week. It can’t be love because no matter how hot Louis is, Liam can now see his profile, things don’t work that way.

“I love you” Aiden says.

“I’ll call you” Louis says.

It’s obvious he won’t call.

“Call me when you get to London”

Apparently Aiden doesn’t know this.

“I’ll call you in the way there.”

Liam is not happy with the idea of driving to London with a player who doesn’t even have the decency of being a good liar. He punches the horn and smiles.

“Sorry, my hand slipped”

Louis doesn’t even look at him. He puts his bags in the trunk and sends Aiden on a few weeks of pinning around waiting for his call and wondering what did he do wrong.

“I’m missing you already” Aiden says.

Seriously? Everyone else knows that when Louis enrolled on this University condom prices went down because wholesale demand makes everything cheaper.

 

When Louis met Liam he doesn’t even notice him. Aiden still smells like the night before shag and Louis is thinking on getting him back to the flat and getting him on his knees for a nice good-bye blowjob. But someone clears his throat and then there’s a horn noise and the first time he meets Liam he’s just the guy who interrupts his thing with Aiden. He’s gorgeous and has really pretty hair but then ruins it by talking.

“Do you want to drive first?”

Liam is a friend of a friend who’s going to London to be a reporter or something; Louis doesn’t really care he just wanted a ride.

“Nah, you’re already there just let me know when you get tired and I’ll take over” Louis says.

“Awesome. I’ve made an itinerary” Oh, yeah. Aiden told him Liam had this OCD thing with well-planned trips. Awesome.

There’s almost a day in distance from where they are to London. When Louis and Liam meet for the first time they’re thinking the same thing. It might be a really long distance to drive together.

They’re right and not.

____________________________________________

“I thought it was romantic” Liam says

“You thought it was romantic?” Louis says ‘romantic’ the same way Nicolo Festa says ‘Genital Herpes’. Like he has had a bad experience with it and just the mere mention of it bring back bad memories. “The scene where the guy tries to steal his best friend wife on Christmas day? You thought it was romantic?”

Liam has watched Love Actually 29 times and a half. The half was the antihistamines fault. He took a little too many and fell asleep before Colin Firth leaves to Portugal.

“I don’t think he wanted to steal her. He just wanted to close that chapter in his life. It’s not easy being in love with someone who doesn’t feel the same way” Liam says.

Louis gives him a quizzical look. Liam blushes but he’s not going to tell him that story, especially because The Big Love Who Wasn’t For Him has changed along with the years. First there was Justin Timberlake, then Jay-Z and recently Taylor Lautner.

“Well, at least they should have let us watched the guy with the signs and the blond girl fuck. He was fit. The husband wasn’t bad either; they could have had a threesome” Louis says.

“She would have never slept with the guy with the signs!” Liam says exasperated

“Why not? You didn’t think he was hot? Louis says confused.

“It not about that. She was married!”

Louis is watching him with this awed face. Like if he was a weird science project.

“You are one of those guys who draws little hearts along with their partner’s name in all of your notebooks, aren’t you?” Louis asks.

“I believe in being faithful if that’s what you’re talking about. I don’t know why I’ll be with someone who doesn’t full fit me spiritual, mentally and physically. We all are looking for that and that’s why Keira Knightley wouldn’t have slept with the guy with the signs. Because she already found all that with her husband. When she kisses the other guy is because she feels sorry for him, because he hasn’t found that.”

“I always thought she went back to her husband because black guys have bigger cocks”

Liam knows,  _he knows_ , that Louis is being a total twat just to make him uncomfortable, maybe. Maybe he IS a total twat.

__________________________________________________

There’s something about Liam, maybe is the puppy face. Louis was the kid who opened all of his toys to see how they worked. He likes mysteries and Liam is something rare: he’s a wholesome guy. Maybe that’s why he’s trying to upset him. He knows he’s being a total twat to him, what he doesn’t know is how to stop. 

They stop in a little restaurant and wait for a table as the waitress looks at Liam upside down, drinking him in. Liam doesn’t even notice, he ignores her even. The only bad thing about him is the clothes. Loose jeans, a low cut t-shirt that you can almost see his nipples, a ratty hoodie and flip-flops. The only thing missing is a fedora and he’ll look like a regular asshole. The guy is unique.

And an optimist.

He believes –I kid you not- in True Love.

“Fucking with the same person forever is depressing, Liam, and if you don’t think so is because you must have had the most boring shags and that’s why you think you’re not missing out. Trust me, you’re missing out. Big time” Louis tells him.

He’s upset. There’s something wholesome about the way he gets upset. It’s like he doesn’t have the same walls that Louis was born with.

“I have had more than decent shags, thank you very much” Liam says.

“With whom?” Louis asks.

“What?”

“With who have you had ‘more than decent shags’”

“I’m not telling you!”

“Ok”

They’re sited in the back. The menu looks good, maybe a number one with a diet coke…

“Danielle Peazer”

“What?” Louis says confused.

Liam turns the menu around. He looks like he regrets saying anything in the first place.

“I have had good shags with Danielle Peazer. There you have it”

Louis knows her. She’s tall and pretty with a hair that could probably swallow you whole if you don’t pay attention.

“I thought you liked dick”

“I believe that love has no gender. The only thing that matters is the person not the equipment” Liam says honestly. It’s weird.

“And here I was thinking that bisexuals were the most degenerate. But look at you doing the missionary with a girl who looks like the president of the Christian league once a month with the lights turned off” Louis says and can see Liam getting more upset.

“We had amazing sex”

“No, Liam. You didn’t have ‘amazing sex’ with Danielle Peazer. It’s the name… ‘Eat me out, Danielle’ ‘Get on your knees, Danielle’ it doesn’t work. Danielle sounds like a name for the villain on a soap-opera not the name you’ll like to scream when you’re having a mind blowing orgasm” It’s not like Louis doesn’t like Danielle, he doesn’t even know her. But he imagines her watching “Love Actually” with Liam and listening to romantic songs on Sunday mornings and he kind of wants to kick her in the shin, to be honest.

“You know what your problem is, Louis?” Liam says and it’s cute that he thinks that he only has one “Your problem is that you prefer to be a pessimist because is easier than thinking that there’s someone out there that might love you and want you just the way you are”

He says so with such honesty that it hurts. No, really. They made this guy and they threw the mold away. He has eyes that look like they belong to a six year old on a Christmas morning. How has he made it to 22? Louis wants to put him in a crystal case so he’ll be saved from the world.

“Well, when I’m watching a porn video I always fast forward to the last orgy, so if I die before I finish it I’ll know that I came in the filthiest part. If that’s being a pessimist, then I guess you’re right”

The future Mr. Peazer rolls his eyes so hard that Louis can almost hear them. Before he can say anything the waitress comes to take their orders. Louis asks for the number two ‘without the chips, thank you. I have to watch the weight’. Liam also orders the number two. Definitely with the chips.

“Besides the fish of number two I want the beef of the number four without the parsley, please. And the squid of number five and the tuna croquets. And if the bacon is crispy, put it on the side, if not I only want the croquets but instead of four I want six. I want the brownie for dessert, does it comes with ice-cream? If it does I want it to be vanilla if there’s not vanilla then I want the pie, two pieces.”

Louis is about to change his theory of dull sex with the lights off, in out, sighs and cuddling all night once a week, because if the guy eats like that, either the hoodie he’s wearing is really good at hiding the fat or they have acrobatic sex in the Christian League. How does he burn all those calories?

___________________________________________________________

“I’ll leave the tip, you’ve barely ate anything” Liam says when they’re done

When Liam finishes putting the money on the table Louis is looking at him. He’s staring at him. Like he’s some kind of weird experiment, Louis turns his head to the side, still looking at him. He’s starting to make Liam uncomfortable. Cute boys used to make him uncomfortable. Not anymore because he’s over it and Louis is a twat so he doesn’t count. It will be nice if he stopped looking, to be honest.

“Do I have something in my face?”

“You’re not ugly, you know that?” Oh, Lord. He gets goose bumps all over.

“Thank you” He says defensive. Exactly how he feels.

“Aiden didn’t tell me you were hot” Louis says apparently not noticing

“Maybe Aiden doesn’t think I’m hot” Aiden doesn’t think a lot, being honest.

“I don’t think is a matter of opinions. Objectively speaking you are really fit”

And he’s disappointed. Even if he knows the legends, even if people say the only reason he passed physics is because he slept with the professor and that they found his pants in the principal office. Despite of all this, Liam expected that Louis Tomlinson was something more than a compulsive player.

“Hey, Aiden is my friend” Liam says

“So?”

“You are dating him!”

“So?”

“So, you’re hitting on me!” Liam gets up and leaves the restaurant. He’s back is burning where Louis is staring at him. He’s sure he’s looking lower than his back, the fucking pervert. It’s a shame because Louis is really handsome and they’ve been listening to his iPod since they leave school and someone who has that good music taste shouldn’t be such an asshole.

____________________________________

Outside the restaurant is starting to get cold. Louis thinks he should have brought a jacket.

“Liam, come on. I wasn’t hitting on you” Louis lies.

“Can’t we just let it be?”

“Of course we can let it be because nothing has happen”

Liam has really pretty lips, they look soft and pink. They could check in the little motel he saw about a mile ago and have a little fun. Perhaps Louis shouldn’t have said anything out loud, Liam is blushed ‘till the tip of his hair and has this look on his face like he’ll like to kill him.

“Louis, we are going to be friends. Just friends”

“Ok, all right. Friends, sure”

That’s the stupidest thing he has ever heard in his life. And he has gone to Aiden’s parties so he’s hear a lot of stupid things.

_____________________________________________

They drive for about three miles in silence. Liam can feel the tension in the air, Louis insinuation weights on them like a third passenger. But if they have to ignore it until they get to London, Liam is okay with it. Louis is not.

“You do realize that two gay men can’t be friends, right?”

“What? No, Why?” That is the dumbest thing he’s heard, is like saying man and woman can’t be friends.

“Because sex always gets in the way” Louis says like is the most obvious thing.

“That’s not true. I have gay friends that I don’t want to sleep with”

“Name one”

“Nicolo Festa”

“Nicolo?? No, he doesn’t count. He’s always wearing those glasses, I’m not even sure he has eyes. And he has a weird head, he doesn’t count”

“You mean that two attractive gay men can’t be friends but if they’re ugly than its okay?”

“Yeah. Well, no. The ugly one might want to sleep with you. Or you could be desperate enough and have drunk your weight on alcohol and get in bed with however looks less blurred. So, no. Two gay men can’t be friends.”

“Aren’t you friends with Niall Horan? Are you saying you’ve slept with him?”

“Niall and I are brothers. That would be incest. I don’t have anything against it, I think is totally okay only if the siblings are hot, like really incredible hot. Like those twins in Game of Thrones”

“It's amazing,  _you look like a normal person_  but actually you're the Angel of Death”

________________________________________________________________

They take turns driving and they listen to Louis iPod and Liam is surprised, again, that someone who has this good taste in music doesn’t care who he sleeps with. They get to London in the afternoon with Jay-Z coming out of the speakers. They say their goodbyes and shake hands in the middle of a park.

“Well” Louis says

“Well” Liam says

“Good luck with the publicity thing”

“Journalism” Liam corrects him

“Yeah, right”

Liam didn’t asked what Louis is going to do. Being Evil, probably. He hopes he doesn’t run into him ever again. In a city this big with so many people, he thinks, it’s going to be really easy to avoid each other.

Liam is wrong, so wrong he can’t even count how wrong he is.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s the second time they share a trip and it’s not better than the last.
> 
> People say that third time is a charm and they’re right about this.

Two years later, Louis is in a billboard in the centre of London and Liam doesn’t really know what he’s announcing, but he’s lying on a beautiful car all tan, with a five o’clock beard and this look on his face that seems to say “come and fuck me, if you dare”, Liam is sure that whatever it is that he’s selling is flying off the shelves.

He’s distracted watching the billboard when he runs into someone and ends up looking down to a really nice smile. Liam loves nice smiles and this one is the nicest one he’s ever seen.

“I’m sorry”

“No, I’m sorry. It was my fault” Liam says

The smile comes with a nice face and a pretty name. Olly Murs, who works as a financial adviser.

It takes them two minutes to get coffee and two months to pick up the perfect Italian tile for their kitchen floor. Andy, who runs the trashy gossip column on Liam’s newspaper and is going to end up in a ditch when Taylor finds out he’s been cheating on her with girls whose age is daring on federal crime, thinks they’re the most happily disgusting couple he has ever seen.

“You’re always together. He even takes you to the airport”

Liam loves when Olly takes him to the airport and kiss him before going to the security check. He’s still smiling when the flight attendant comes to his seat and asks him if he wants the nuts or the crackers.

“Both. Can you bring me a plate? I like to mix them and juice, please. Three quarters of orange and one of pumpkin. In the same glass. Thank you”

“I knew it was you”

He turns around so fast when he hears that voice he can hear his neck snap. He is wearing sunglasses inside the plane and sits in the empty seat next to Liam without even asking. He has cut his hair and he was good looking in university but the word to describe him right now (and Liam is a journalist, he knows words) is sinful.

Seeing Louis shocks him so hard that he almost loses his appetite.

And Liam Payne never loses his appetite.

_________________________________________

Liam is wearing a Polo Ralph Lauren shirt. He’s gone from human fedora to preppy in no time. His hair is longer and curlier and doesn’t look happy to see him. Maybe he doesn’t recognize him.

“Louis” He says “Louis Tomlinson, we traveled together to London two years ago. I’m the guy who watches the end of the porn videos first so if I die I’ll know I came in the filthiest part”

He says that just to see if Liam still gets mad.

He does.

“Yeah, I remember” He says grinding his teeth “Louis, how is Aiden doing?”

“Don’t you know? You were his best friend or something, right?” Louis says and is pleased to see that Liam still blushes when he gets embarrassed.

“I guess we lost touch” Liam says.

“Pity and to think we didn’t slept together because you were friends”

“Trust me, that wasn’t the only reason”

“Yeah, whatever. Tell me about your life; have you find True Love?” Louis says rolling his eyes.

And just like that Liam’s eyes light up like a fucking Christmas tree and tells him all about this Olly guy who works as a financial adviser and comes from the poshest part of London. Apparently Liam’s change of clothes is not for conviction but for contagion. It’s cute, in a really depressing way, but cute.

When Louis tells him he’s getting married Liam almost chokes on his orange and pumpkin juice.

_______________________________________________

 

“YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED? Really? With whom?”

“Eleanor Calder. Politics major. Could have been a model if she wanted. She’s keeping her last name”

Louis Tomlinson. Married. To a woman. Liam thought that it’d be more likely that he’ll have a STD named after him than this happening.

“I thought you were gay”

“Apparently you were right about love above the equipment”

Wow

“Wow”

“Yeah”

Well, fuck.

“I can see something different about you Louis. You sound almost optimistic”

“Yeah, it gets a time where you just get tired of it all, you know? You meet someone online; jerk off in front of the computer a few times. You get these high hopes because they don’t misspell cock or come and when you meet them in real life they’ve been lying about the 10-inch cock and don’t even have the decency to wax their backs. In the end you fuck him and stay in bed hoping he doesn’t ask for your Facebook name so he can add you or follow you on Twitter” Louis says shrugging like all that is the most normal thing in the world.

“You really think that?” Liam asks

“Don’t you? You know what’s your problem Liam?” Louis doesn’t even give him time to answer “Your problem is that you want someone who would never unfriend you on Facebook and puts in his relationship status ‘Married in Kensington’”

“I don’t have any problem! I don’t even have a Facebook!” Liam almost shouts.

Luckily his flight isn’t that long and he has his laptop to distract him. He doesn’t have anything to do, really, but it keeps Louis from talking to him.

The universe hates him and he runs into him in the terminal treadmill.

“Hey, do you want to get a drink with me tonight?”

“No, thanks”

Liam doesn’t have much experience being rude to people but this guy makes him want to take out his inner asshole for a ride.

“I’m asking as a friend”

Yeah. Right.

“You said that two gay men can’t be friends”

The treadmill is going quite fast, but Liam starts walking anyway. He has long legs and hopes that Louis gives up and stays behind, but no. He follows him.

“They can be friends if none of them is attracted to each other. The lack of attraction invalids the sexual aspect of the relationship and saves the friendship. You can be friends with a gay ugly guy”

Liam is pretty sure he just called him ugly and feels vaguely offended. Not because he cares about what Louis thinks but two years ago he said he was hot and he know he’s not uglier than two years ago. In fact, he dresses so much better. Olly’s sister took him shopping and now he wears pants that actually fit.

“Louis…” Liam is trying to say good-bye without being too rude but Louis starts talking.

“You know what? Forget it, being ugly doesn’t help things, usually ugly guys won’t get any and if they do they would just be fucking someone. And they would just be two ugly guys fucking, they wouldn’t be friends. If a hot guy and an ugly fucked maybe they could be friends but who are we kidding? A hot guy wouldn’t sleep with an ugly guy and the ugly guy would jerk off thinking about the hot one and no one wants an ugly guy jerking off thinking about you”

He says all of this with the same tone, like is something that’s just going through his mind. Liam looks at him horrified. He should let it go, _he should,_  but he can’t.

“So is a fact you are the hot friend, right?” Liam says sarcastically

 “Oh, no. I’m the guy who is so fit that turns down the hot guy that makes him so depressed, he lowers his standards and sleeps with the ugly one. This ruins their friendship completely, of course.”

Of course.

“Louis, I have to go”

He looks like he gives up. He stops walking and looks at him a little disappointed. Liam doesn’t feel bad about it. Not at all, not even a tiny bit.

“Say hi to you adviser for me, yeah?” He’s still wearing his sunglasses but behind them it looks like he has a human emotion.

He still doesn’t feel bad about it. Really. Nothing.

“I will” Liam keeps walking and doesn’t turn around to see if Louis is following.

It’s the second time they share a trip and it’s not better than the last.

People say that third time is a charm and they’re right about this.

_____________________________________________________

Harry works in a rehabilitation centre and Andy, miraculously, still works in the newspaper, so they don’t see each other all that much but they always have lunch together on saturdays. It’s a tradition. And traditions have to be respected even if it is the same saturday that you and your boyfriend of three years break up. Liam tells them this when the waiter is putting their food on the table. He’s not that upset, really. He was sick of being with someone who refused to introduce him as his boyfriend in the office Christmas parties or take him to brunch with his family on Sundays.

Liam has never fit well inside the closet. Andy never understood why Olly insisted in keeping them in.

“I don’t get it. Why not admit he’s gay? You only did gay things. Like going for walks in the cemetery and shit. Who the fuck does that? Gay guys!”

Liam is fine. He was the one who broke it up. He feels amazing. He’s not just moving around his egg on the plate because he’s depressed. They’re just not tasty.

“It’s okay. We wanted different things”

Andy makes a weird face. That’s never a good sign.

“I thought wanting different things was good, you know. One fucks and the other get fucked, right?”

When Liam first met Andy he used to be scandalized by everything he said. Now he doesn’t even bat an eye.

“It’s not that… it’s like we were stuck on the relationship. Last week we went to the movies and he wanted to watch “Letters to John” when there was “The Dark Knight”. Clearly we wanted different things in life"

Harry always gives him his full attention and then says something you wouldn’t have guess in a million years. He’s a weird guy.

“Hey, I know tons of guys who’ll go out with you. And I swear I’ll only give your number to the ones who don’t have criminal records”

Oh, that’s nice.

“Thanks, but I think I’ll like to be on my own for a little while. Get to know myself. I might even try to learn to play an instrument” He has always wanted to do that but there’s so many things you forget to do when you have a boyfriend (who refuses to say in public that he’s your boyfriend) “What about the sax? It’s sexy, right?”

“Liam” Harry says “I love you but you can’t even clap your hands with rhythm”

Andy agrees. Clearly he needs better friends who support him.

“It’s the truth, mate. Besides you might get all jazzy and start hating life and saying things like ‘I wish God would let me drown in this ditch because love is a bitch’”

This morning is really beautiful. It’s sunny and warm for once. They’re sitting in a balcony and he can see London in its entire splendour. Liam remembers Sunday mornings with Olly watching the flowers bloom, drowning in love and not doing anything.

“Love is not a bitch” He says sighing “Love is amazing”

_______________________________________________

The stadium is full of people and the mother fucking Manchester United is losing. It’s exactly what Louis needed for this to be the worst week of his life.

“Love is a FUCKING BITCH” Louis growls.

 Niall doesn’t look all that amazed by his revelation.

“Tell me something that I don’t know, mate”

Something that he doesn’t know? That’s easy.

“Eleanor dump me”

That makes Niall turn around and almost choke on his beer.

“You’re kidding”

“Two days ago”

Niall stops paying attention to the game. That’s true friendship right there. Besides music, football is the only thing Niall speaks well of, Louis could hug him. He might even do it; it’s been an awful week.

 “It might… it might be one of those hormonal things girls get. Maybe she’s upset about something and it’s nothing that some boy bashing, a few ice-cream bins and some chick-flicks can’t fix and she’ll be back in no time”

“I didn’t make myself clear. She didn’t just dump me. She dump me for someone else”

“YOU’RE FUCKING KIDDING ME”

Their whole section is now looking at them. Louis smiles at them, not a happy smile, one that says “mind your own business”.

“He’s a yoga instructor” He says, “His name is Ed. And before I left she told me he gives her everything I never did”

“And what the fuck is that? Herbal tea and a fucking contracture?”

 That’s a great question

“Fuck me if I now. I asked her, silly me, I had to. And you know what she said? ‘Well if you don’t know, Louis, I’m not gonna tell you’ Why do women have to be like that? The live complaining about how we don’t communicate and when we want to they laugh at us. I bet is a complot among women, they talk about it in the gym or when they’re getting their nails done ‘Oh my husband asked me what was wrong the other day. The fucking idiot, HA HA HA, high five!’”

Three years. Louis had never believed in fidelity or marriage but  _she made him believe._ What kind of sociopath bitch makes you believe in something and then take it away from you?

“Fuck, and what are you planning to do?” Niall asks.

“I don’t know. For the moment I’m gonna grow a beard. Eleanor hated it; she said it ruined the thousands of pounds I spent in facials”

“That’s right, grow a beard. Fuck her”

The Manchester fucks it again. What an awful season.

“Yeah. Fuck her”

The beard is itching. But he’s fucking growing it goddammit.

___________________________________________________

Liam likes Sundays. Not doing anything, waking up late, eating so much he can’t even move and wondering around in the streets. Buying the newspaper and have a second breakfast in the Starbucks and not thinking about Olly at all. At least that’s the plan and Liam is a fan of following his own plans.

“Li” Harry says.

“What?”

Harry is the least subtle guy in the world. When he says ‘Don’t look’, Liam knows that however he’s not supposed to be looking at already knows they’re talking about them.

“Don’t look” Yep that’s Harry, alright “But there’s a guy over the erotic section that hasn’t stopped looking at you since we got here”

Since he broke up with Olly, Harry is obsessed with finding guys for him, so Liam is not very convinced that this is true. It’ll be a very Harry thing to do to want to match him with the first porn addicted he sees. But when he looks up from the trashy magazines he likes to read, there he is. A guy with blue eyes and a beard who looks weirdly familiar. In fact his line of thought goes something like this ‘hot/ do I know him?/ but who../ OH MY GOD, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE’

“Liam”

Harry left his side when he wasn’t looking. He’s a matchmaker at heart.

“Hi, Louis”

They stare at each other for a while. It’s weird because Liam could say something like ‘Hey, how you doing’ or ‘wow, it’s been a while’ or ‘look, the guy who thinks he’s being subtle over there is my friend Harry’. He could even say ‘Jesus look at the time, I’m already late’. But when he’s going to say one of these things, Louis smiles and for the first time Liam actually  _notice_ that smile. It’s soft and just for him, and so different from the one when they first met, it’s a smile that isn’t looking for anything.

“You look good, Liam. It’s good to see you”

He’s surprised to hear the honesty in his voice. He’s even more surprised when he answers with the same honesty.

“You too, Louis”

_____________________________________________

They end up drinking tea in nearby park. Louis ask Liam when he gets tired of standing up in the library with the Gay Kama sutra in his hands and his chest full of words he’ll like to share with Liam.

It’s weird because he hasn’t really thought that much about him in all these years, but when he sees him he starts talking about Eleanor and the divorce and how horrible life has been lately, without thinking that maybe is a little weird to tell him all of this. When he says ‘let’s get out of here, I’ll buy you some tea’ he thinks that Liam will say something like ‘Sorry, I’m in a hurry” so he’s surprised when he sighs and says ‘I take mine with 3 sugars and a biscuit”

He looks good, too good for someone who eats so many carbs. He’s wearing jeans that make his legs look a thousand miles long and he’s so much confident that when he was a kid in that first trip. He’s shaved his hair and it makes him look hotter and more comfortable in his own skin.

“I’m really sorry about your divorce, Louis. Really”

“Nah, it’s okay. I can grow a beard now”

Liam smiles.

“It doesn’t take much to make you happy, huh?”

Louis hasn’t really given too much thought about being happy. Liam looks like the kind of guy who doesn’t settles for less. He’s a great listener, he doesn’t remember that. He doesn’t give him any advice, he just listens. Then he darkness a little bit and tells him that Poshest Magnificus and him have broken up too.

“We wanted different things in life” Liam says “Olly wanted a career, being the CEO of a great company and make his parents happy”

“And you?”

Liam looks him in the eye, not hiding anything.

“I wanted him to leave all of that for me”

Louis doesn’t know this Olly guy but he’ll like to punch him in the face. Hell. He’ll like him to fall in love with Eleanor and then have her leave him for a yoga instructor whose come apparently taste like chocolate ice-cream and can suck his own dick (maybe).

“Well, you can always out him if you want. Don’t you have a sex tape of you two fucking in the kitchen that you can post on Youporn and link it to his colleagues?”

“We never had sex in the kitchen. The floor had an Italian tile that was very cold”

He looks sad when he says that. Louis hates Olly Murs.

______________________________________________

After the tea they walk around the park and none of them mentions that is getting late, they’ve been talking for hours and maybe one of them has things they have to do. Liam thinks that surely Louis has something better to do. But Liam doesn’t want to leave yet; he’s pleasantly surprised to find out that Louis is really easy to talk to. In that car trip and in that awful plane conversation he had the feeling that Louis was trying to beat him in something that Liam didn’t understand. Now he looks calmer. Sadder.

More handsome as well but Liam is trying to not pay attention to that. He’s the kind of handsome that if you think about it too much your head might explode. He’s always been. With a five o’clock shadow beard, aviator sunglasses and hoarse voice, he looks better in this moment than in those commercials Liam has seen him when his changing channels in the T.V. When they’re walking around the park people turn to look at him and he’s sure it’s not because they recognize him. It’s because when he walks next to them they think ‘Are you really that hot? Really?’

“I’m not that worried about Olly, really. I could see it coming and besides I got the flat. The rent is cheap and is in a nice neighbourhood, I would had fought dirty for it if it came to it”

“I let her have ours. I don’t want to look at the dinner table and think ‘Look that’s were that yoga guy with the magic cock give her a tantric massage and a thousand orgasms’. Besides we lived in this really posh neighbourhood with a lot of frigid woman with nothing better to do than gossip about the guys I might bring home. They should buy a fucking dildo and leave me alone. Speaking about that, do you know how long has it been since I fucked a guy? There won’t be a hot guy I don’t fuck and kinky thing that I won’t try”

It doesn’t make sense but Liam blushes all over.

“Well…” Liam says stuttering “I”

Was that a come on? Does he enter in the ‘hot guy’ category? They’ve had a fantastic morning, but Olly just left him or he left Olly he’s not really sure and Louis looks like he’s amazing in bed and Liam is a bit sexually frustrated but it would be a really bad idea because Louis is crazy and other reasons that he can’t think about right now because Louis puts his arm around his shoulder. What did he meant by kinky things?

“And we’re going to find you a guy who doesn’t care about what the world or his parents think, alright?”

Oh, ok. Great. He wasn’t hitting on him. That’s a relief.

“I would like you to be my friend, Louis. Not my matchmaker”

Louis stares at him for a little while and then he  _blooms_ with this amazing smile that crinkles his eyes and lights up the whole city.

“Friends, eh? You know what, Liam? I think I would like that” He seems so happy that Liam melts a little bit and forgets any idea he might have had in the last minute.

It’s weird but he thinks they can make it work; they’re going to be great  _friends_.

Louis Tomlinson and him. Friends. Who would have thought?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever since Niall moved to London they’ve been going to the same bar between streets Just-around-the-corner and Blink-and-you-misses-it. It’s an Irish bar where they play Niall’s soccer team games. The beer is horrible and Niall loves it.
> 
> “Lou, I don’t get this relationship. You talk about everything”
> 
> “We’re friends, Niall”

“I don’t get it” Niall says sleepily on the phone. It's noon, he just woke up “I don’t see your face for, like, two weeks because you’re dating a guy?”

“You haven’t seen me in two weeks because you’ve been in one of your musical drunkenness, arsehole”

“The correct term is ‘touring’, love” Yeah, Louis has gone ‘touring’ with Niall, ok. Music that doesn’t make a lot of sense, semi naked girls and unsanitary bars.

“And I’m not dating him, twat”

“You told me you went to the park and had dinner, you went to a museum. Lou, face it, you’re dating this guy”

“We’re friends, Niall” Louis says sighing.

There’s a long silence in the line.

“You made another friend?! Besides me? WHY?”

Louis doesn’t think he’s kidding. That’s what makes it funnier.

_______________________________________

“What’s up, Payne”

“Hi, Andy”

“Are you with your husband?”

Liam is with Harry.

“Louis is not my husband. We’ve been over this, in the newspaper, half an hour ago”

“Yeah but you snuck out before I was done talking”

Harry is doing a talent show in his rehabilitation centre. They’re in a flea market looking for things he can use, he’s really happy, of course.  Harry says ‘Ask him if he wants anything’

“Hey, Harry asks if you want some 80’s clothes or the Back Street Boys cds”

“You know what I want, Liam? I want you to admit that you like this guy. I haven’t seen you in two weeks because you’ve been spending all your time with him. You went to the fucking aquarium for Pete’s sake. Don’t you realize you’re married to this guy?”

“I’m not sleeping with Louis, Andy” Liam says exasperated.

“Of course you’re not having sex! You’re married!”

He doesn’t even answer anything; he just hangs up on him. He knows Andy will bring it up again soon but, really, what’s there to say?

He and Louis are friends. Surprisingly? they’re really good friends.

__________________________

It’s weird been friends with Liam. It’s one of the weirdest things that have ever happen to Louis. It’s not like he doesn’t have any friends, he has Niall who’s always a great laugh, knows where the good parties are happening and tells him what he needs to hear even when he doesn’t want to hear it. They’ve known each other forever, since Niall move from Ireland, and Louis would kill anyone who hurt him. Niall is an idiot but he’s his idiot.

Liam isn’t like Niall, at all. He never calls him at two in the morning saying ‘I fucking hate the mother fucking guy of the label, fucking twat’ is hang over 5 days a week or doesn’t think that getting a beer before 11 a.m. is weird.

Liam likes to take his dog for a walk in the afternoon, knows the best restaurants in the city and can talk for hours about his turtles. Liam thinks that everything will work its self out somehow, sees the best in everybody and makes waitress and waiters melt when he ends his ridiculous orders with ‘Please? I just really like it that way’. Louis is not really sure why he wants to be his friend, why he calls him just to hang on or take his dog for a walk, he doesn’t really care either. When they’re in the park and he makes Liam laughs with one of his lame jokes the world doesn’t look like a place where your wife leaves you and your agent is useless. It looks like a place with a great sunset and a great guy who laughs with his head back and with crinkles in his eyes.

They go to the movies sometimes.

Louis hasn’t gone to the movies in years. Eleanor didn’t go because she refused to go to places with sticky floors or lice. Louis used to go years ago just to make out with pretty boys with hipster glasses.

“So you’ve never been to the movies just to watch a film?”

“No, not that I remember”

“But you do watch movies, right?”

“I download them”

“I mean you watch movies besides porn, right?”

“Movies of people who actually wear clothes? Interesting” It’s not like he only watches porn but Liam is giving him this ‘You’re an idiot’ face and he likes it.

“Louis come on, you have watched a movie, at least, in the last 10 years”

He thinks about it for a while. He’s a bit embarrassed but Liam is all sharing and caring and talking about kitties and puppies so he can’t make fun of him, right?

“I like Love Actually”

“No way” Liam says with a big smile.

“What’s wrong with Love Actually?” Louis asks defensively.

“Nothing” Liam says and looks down, he looks a bit embarrassed too. “I watch it every Christmas, I used to watch it with Olly, our little tradition, you know?”

Louis wants to split open Olly’s head, not to kill him but to actually know why he let someone like Liam go. Seriously who lets someone that smiles like that go? The guy must be a fucking idiot.

“Well, if you don’t have anyone better this Christmas I’ll watch it with you” Louis says and he’s not flirting. It’s the first time that he’s not trying to flirt and is a freeing experience. Not thinking about fucking him and then how to get him out of his bed.

“Are you asking me out? Because I know what you do in your dates and I don’t want to end up in a porn site, thank you”

Louis laughs so hard his side hurts and he only shuts up when the man in the row behind them starts complaining.

______________________________________

Sometimes they do things Liam likes, like walking around the park, eating in restaurants or watching rom-coms. Sometimes they do things Louis likes or things he doesn’t like but he has to do. Like going to openings of things he doesn’t care about.

“You’re telling me that this guy used to be a model?”

They’re in an art gallery watching an exhibition called “Freedom” or something like that. It’s the photographic evolution of someone who slowly gets fat. It’s the stupidest thing Liam has ever seen, to be honest. The protagonist of the night is an old partner of Louis who has taken a like for modern art. Liam has heard all the critics praise the way this guy has captured the way his body has deteriorated since he left the fashion business.

“Did you work a lot with him?”

“We made a D&G underwear advertisement in a Greek beach one time. The sun was unbearable, I got freckled everywhere”

Liam doesn’t know what D&G is. Louis tries to explain and Liam doesn’t tell him that he didn’t understand him. He also doesn’t tell him that the image of him and other guy rubbing each other in a beach is something that he prefers not think about,

“Two guys in their pants in a beach? You must have had a girl somewhere, right? To not be that obvious?”

“It’s Dolce and Gabanna, Liam. They want to be obvious”

“This is what you’re going to do when you retire? Take pictures of your love handles and call it art? Or are you just going to screw all the boys in Abercrombie?”

“Hey don’t talk shit about Abercrombie, I love it there. I always end up taking something from there when I go shopping”

“I have never seen you wear anything from there”

“Did I say I took clothes? Did I mention clothes? Abercrombie is like that restaurant you go every day, the one in front of the newspaper, where everyone knows your name”

“Oh yeah everybody in Abercrombie knows your name and your condom size”

Louis laughs loud and with crinkled eyes. Liam tries to imagine him in ten years from now. He’ll have those crinkles even more pronounced and will still make heads turn around when he walks by. Love handles or not, suddenly Liam is actually curious.

“Seriously, what are you going to do when you retire? There must be something that you want to do”

Louis stays quiet for a few moments just looking at him.

“No one had asked me that before”

When the waiter goes by Liam steals two glasses of champagne, his throat feels dry all of the sudden. When Louis starts telling him about what he’ll like to do he blushes a little bit and Liam thinks ‘You can do it, you can do anything you want’.

___________________________________________

 Ever since Niall moved to London they’ve been going to the same bar between streets Just-around-the-corner and Blink-and-you-misses-it. It’s an Irish bar where they play Niall’s soccer team games. The beer is horrible and Niall loves it.

“Lou, I don’t get this relationship. You talk about everything”

“We’re friends, Niall”

The bar always smells like BO, old beer and the floors are so dirty you can’t even see their color. Louis hates it but he comes with Niall every time Niall wants to because Niall is his friend and that’s how friendship works. Yet, he who demands such sacrifice of him doesn’t get that him and Liam are friends. Niall is stupid.

“Liam doesn’t find weird that you’ve seen Love Actually like a hundred times?”

“Colin Firth is in it, okay? Who doesn’t fancy Colin Firth?”

“So, he doesn’t think you’re crazy, even thought you totally are, you think he’s amazing and he’s not ugly” Niall says and Louis thinks about Liam. Tall, broad back, long strong arms and eyes a deep brown.

“He’s not ugly”

Ugly? Liam? Not at all.

“And you’re not sleeping with him”

“No, Niall, I’m not sleeping with him. Why can’t you understand this? It’s important to me”

Liam is important to him. Niall sips his beer, puts a hand on his shoulder and says ‘Mate’ with a very serious tone.

“Louis, mate. You’re really afraid of being happy”

_________________________________

They go to the theatre and Louis confesses he’ll like to be an actor. He wasn’t that bad at it when he was in school but then the model thing happened and now he thinks he’s too old to be part of it all. Liam doesn’t think it’s too late and insists on him at least trying for like two hours. He has so much faith in him is almost ridiculous.

“You haven’t even seen me act. How are you so sure I’m good at it?”

“I see you act all the time. That’s what you do when you fuck all those guys, you convince them that you’re a virgin but you’re willing to change that or that you were a monk but you just quitted and need some company”

None of those stories are true, but Louis might use them. Liam has a very active imagination for a guy who only believes on having sex with someone when you’re in love. They don’t talk that much about sex. Well, they do, but it’s mostly Louis telling Liam his latest fling and Liam making faces. Even if his dick fall out and Louis stopped having sex, he’ll still do it just to see Liam blushed face.

“We used a harness, Liam. Haven’t you tried the swing?”

“What? NO! God, no.”

If Liam talked more about what makes him all hot and bothered Louis wouldn’t be so curious, he’s sure. But he doesn’t talk about it and Louis wants to make fun of him a little bit.

“I bet your dreams are PG”

“My erotic dreams are perfectly… erotic” Liam says and Louis has a really hard time picturing that.

“Like what?”

“Well, I only have one. To be honest” Louis really wants to laugh at him, but he also wants to know so he keeps quiet.

“I’m listening”

“Okay, hum, there’s a guy” Liam starts

“What does he look like?”

“I don’t know. I can’t see his face”

“Why not? Are you blindfolded?” Louis says interested.

“NO, it’s a dream, ok? There’s a guy, a faceless guy who RIPES off my clothes”

“And then what? Is it like an S&M thing where he tells you ‘on your knees, whore’?”

Liam blushes and looks vaguely horrified.

“NO, just some faceless guy rips of my clothes and that’s it”

“And that’s it. That’s your erotic dream? Nothing ever changes?”

“The clothes I’m wearing”

They’ve been walking for half an hour looking for the ‘best biscuits in tow, I swear. They’re just a little hidden’. Before they enter the bakery Liam stops and stares at him.

“’On your knees, whore’?”

“I dated a judge once.  Judges are weird, Liam”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’re disgusting. Absolutely disgusting” says Liam and decides to just focus in his sandwich. When he looks up he sees Louis staring him, he hasn’t touch the salad in his plate.
> 
> “Did you just say that my eyes are pretty?”

Liam doesn’t get it. Okay, Louis likes sex, who doesn’t? And he just got out of a relationship; he deserves all the casual sex he wants. He’s not looking for the love of his life, Liam gets it. But does he have to pick the worst guys he can find? Maybe he deliberately chooses guys who he can simply fuck and then throw out of bed right after they’re finished. Liam doesn’t get it.

“I’m so glad we didn’t sleep together in that trip. Otherwise, right now I’ll be the guy you left at three in the morning in bed because you had to go feed your goose. And you don’t even have a goose”

They’re having lunch in the restaurant in front of Liam’s paper, the one where everyone knows his name and his ridiculous orders. They also have the best cheesecake in England.

“Why do you care, Li? It has nothing to do with you”

It’s wrong, self-destructive and… and it has to do with him. He doesn’t know why but the conversation is starting to make him upset.

“Of course I care. You play guys like me, who think they hook up with the GQ cover and they think they’re so lucky when they look at your pretty blue eyes and think ‘there’s no way he would lie to me’ and then they get depressed because you don’t call them back even when you told them that you don’t eat out just anyone and that they’re are special”

“Mate, be honest with me. Do you have a camera in my bedroom?” says Louis laughing like that’s the funniest thing he’s heard in a while. It’s not funny. There’s an army of guys with their hearts broken out there.

“You’re disgusting. Absolutely disgusting” says Liam and decides to just focus in his sandwich. When he looks up he sees Louis staring him, he hasn’t touch the salad in his plate.

“Did you just say that my eyes are pretty?”

Liam starts chewing loudly to avoid the question. Yeah, right, like Louis needs more ego busting like he doesn’t know half the restaurant is staring at him. Sometimes going out with Louis makes him feel like the ugly duckling and hearing all of his stories make him wonder if he could have been one of those guys.

“Ok, the way I see it, the GQ cover with the pretty eyes ate you out and then had to leave unexpectedly. What’s wrong with that?” Louis says like he really doesn’t get it.

“I can’t even begin to explain what’s wrong with what you said. Besides… maybe the guy wanted to wake up next to the GQ cover and eat him out”

Louis gets quiet, like really quiet. The kind of quiet that makes you a little uncomfortable.

“If we ever sleep together, Liam, remind me to spend the night, yeah?”

“If we ever sleep together, Louis, remind me to call Lindsey Lohan and ask for the best rehab centre, yeah?”

Louis laughs with the crinkles by his eyes and everything. Liam doesn’t know why, he wasn’t kidding.

“Don’t get mad at me, Liam. Okay, I get something out of sleeping with them but they don’t go disappointed, trust me. Okay? Just trust me”

He says so with such confidence, so sure of himself like he’s the best and he knows it. It rubs Liam the wrong way.

______________________________________________________________

Louis doesn’t know how they went from eating to talking about his skills in bed. It’s weird because Liam looks really upset about the whole thing. He must be really mad because he’s saying crazy things, like, he actually implied that Louis doesn’t know how to find a guy prostate.

“Liam, I ASSURE, I know how to find it. Find it and leave it satisfied”

“How do you know?” Liam asks

“Because they tell me!”

“How do you know they’re not lying?” He definitely took stupid pills this morning. I mean, really?

“They’re lying to me when they come? Because that is a proof, tangible undeniable proof. Proof in the sheets, in my stomach and sometimes there is also proof in the fucking nightstand.” Louis knows he’s raising his voice; a chubby lady in the table next to them keeps eyeing them but if Liam doesn’t mind neither does Louis.

“Tell me something, do you jerk them off when you… you know?” He makes a vague gesture with his hands. Louis translates.

“While I fuck them?”

“Yes, while you fuck them”

“Yeah, sure. Sometimes.” Not always because he’s amazing in bed but he only has two hands and sometimes he needs the two of them just to keep the balance “Sometimes I leave them to do it themselves, I mean I’m busy fucking them!”

“See? They come because they’re jerking off, Louis, not because you’re stroking the right place”

He says so like is the most obvious thing in the world and just keeps eating his sandwich. Louis wants to grab him and shake him until he changes his mind and just…

“I’m telling you, I know how to find it”

“How do you know?”

“BECAUSE THEY TELL ME. They can’t fake that!”

Something flashes in Liam’s face. Something different and intense.  He says ‘Yeah, okay’ and starts stabbing the salad in his plate. Sits differently with his legs open and back in the chair and all of the sudden he says ‘Oh, fuck’. Louis first reaction is to worry. Maybe eating so much has finally caught up with him and has a sudden urgency to go to the restroom.

“What happened? Are you okay?”

He doesn’t answer. He raises his voice so everyone in the restaurant and all fucking England can hear him, grabs the table and makes the best impression Louis has ever seen of someone having the best shag of his live. Is so realistic he blushes a little and Louis could swear he’s sweating. He starts mumbling ‘no wait, wait, slower, just like that, yeah, yeah, there’. Then he starts growling ‘that, do that again but’ he grabs the table more strongly ‘harder, FUCK, harder’. He sounds upset when he says ‘yes, Oh God, yes’ then he swallows a little and moans ‘that, keep doing that’. He moans and growls and begs for someone, who’s not there but you can easily imagine, to keep fucking him ‘just like that, there, do that again. OH GOD’.

 The whole restaurant is staring at him, watching him rub against the chair, stretching his neck and doing this hypnotic trusting move with his hips that gives the final touch to make the whole thing even more pornographic. He starts demanding and begin at the same time. Some like ‘I love it, fuck, keep going, keep going, keep going, there THERE THERE, yes, yes, FUCK ME, OH GOD, I’m gonna, keep going please, I’m gonna…’. He finishes not only with a ‘ah’ or even a few ‘ahs’ he finishes with a series of ‘ahs’ that sounds like he’s hurting and he’s so desperate he can’t handle it. He looks like he’s about to cry, he grabs the chair and bites his lip, letting his pink, wet tongue right there where the imaginary guy would have his mouth if Liam was actually coming, with his ass contracting and getting his stomach wet. All tan and muscle shining with sweat with the sheets made a mess around him… and just eating a turkey sandwich in front of him like nothing had happened.

The whole restaurant is in silence. Waiting for the people of MTv to come out and tell them they’ve been part of a prank, or something. The first to move is a waiter that can’t seem to close his mouth. The first to talk is the chubby lady who has been staring at Liam’s plate and Liam the whole evening.

“I’ll have the same thing he’s having”

It takes Louis 15 minutes to regain composure. The same time it takes for his boner to come down. Liam orders two desserts and takes two slices of cheesecake to go. If it bothers him that everyone is staring him, he doesn’t say anything.

_______________________________________________

It occurs to them all of the sudden while they’re jogging a Sunday morning. Liam says ‘I think Harry is jealous of you’, Louis says ‘I know Niall is planning to kill you’. They both think is stupid and that they should take advantage of the situation. They could go out, the fourth of them, together sometime. Liam tells Louis what a great guy Harry is, calm and cheeky. Louis, no matter how much he tries to deny it, thinks Niall is amazing. He’s the kind of guy that would give his left arm for a friend and calls his mom every week.

“Hey” says Liam “if he’s so amazing why haven’t you introduce him to me? Are you ashamed of me?” He’s kidding, of course. He knows Louis isn’t ashamed of him. Liam thinks he finds him perfectly convenient for a date. Not with him, of course. But for other people.

“You haven’t introduce Harry to me either, I could ask the same thing”

They get to rest area. They take a little brake, drink water and stare at each other like idiots for a little while. Louis says ‘Wanna go out with Niall?’ at the same time Liam asks ‘Wanna go on a date with Harry?’

They make a double date.

They don’t speak the rest of the way. Talking while running is bad for the body.

_____________________________________

They have a brief discussion about where they should have dinner. Louis suggests McDonalds, Liam tells him that Harry has a problem with McDonalds salaries and the way they treat people in rehab. Liam suggest a Camboyan restaurant he discovered the week before, Louis says no to that, Niall can make too many jokes that rime with camboyan.

They decided to go to an Argentinean restaurant. Meaty enough for Niall and exotic enough for Harry.

 ______________________________________

“I didn’t even know we had Argentinean restaurants in London, man. Liam discovers these weird places all the time but they’re usually really good, so I decided to give it a shoot” Niall doesn’t look convinced. Not about the restaurant, he still hasn’t met a food he doesn’t like, but about meeting Liam.

He’s probably regretting that time he bought that tequila bottle with the Chinese label and they got so drunk that Niall end up confessing Louis he has had fantasies about other blocks.

“But fantasies where I’m doing the fucking, ok? I don’t want anything going near my ass. I can go a little gay but not all the way”

It’s just dinner; Louis has already told him that. But Niall still doesn’t look like he wants to go. For fucks sakes, he should be thanking the God of Pop Music that Liam wants to go out with him. Louis tries to explain that to him when they’re walking to the restaurant. Niall thinks he’s trying too hard to sell his guy to him.

“You’ll see; he has a great personality. He knows tons of artists and shit you like”

“So he’s ugly as fuck”

“What? NO! When have I told you he’s ugly as fuck?”

“You said he has a  _great personality,_ he probably looks like Simon Cowell or he’s fat. Is he fat?”

“He’s not ugly AT ALL. And I’m sure that under all those ridiculous large shirts he wears is a candy bar waiting to be unwrapped” Louis thinks he has seen in when they’re jogging and Liam pulls his shirt up to wipe his forehead “In fact he’s one of the few guys who goes to the gym to exercise”

“And you’re not fucking him”

“For the million time. NO, I’m not fucking him” Louis says exasperated.

Niall stops walking in the middle of the street and stares at him.

“Then you’re hiding something from me, I know it. Is he bald? Is he one of those guys who has a toupee and grows a moustache to disguise it? You want me to fuck a bald guy with a toupee, Louis. You should be ashamed of yourself”

Louis sometimes wonders why he’s friends with Niall.

“You know what, Niall? Fuck you” says Louis and keeps walking to the restaurant.

“Hey, no. We agreed that if there’s any fucking at all, I’d be the one doing it. But if is a bald guy with a moustache, then no fucking way” says Niall jogging to catch up with him.

_____________________________________________________

Is a great night, the restaurant is close enough to Liam’s flat that they can walk to it so he and Harry are taking their time to get there.

“Six months ago I wouldn’t even go near where that restaurant, Olly never liked it, but Louis told me he has never tried the Argentinean chorizo and I thought to myself why not? Besides when a model wants to try something greasy it’s has to be good right? I’ve told you he’s a MODEL, right?”

Harry has been so sceptical with this date that Liam is almost offended. With the so many times he has tried to set Liam up and know he doesn’t trust him to get him a good date? Seriously, what part of ‘Louis is amazing’ he doesn’t get?

“I don’t know, Li”

“Harry, how long has it been since you took a guy home?”

“Two nights ago”

“For something besides giving him soup or shelter or whatever charity thing that you do?”

“Oh. Well, a while”

“Yeah, so shut up. And ask for the dulce de leche, I’ve heard great things about it”

________________________________________________

The thing is like this, Harry is hot, like  _really_ hot with his curly hair, long limbs and pretty big green eyes but he talks really slow and only talks about reintegration of addicts to society.

“Big companies are full of hypocrisy, you know? When there’s a marathon everybody signs up and shit but if you ask for a donation for people with addictions they close their doors in your face”

“Hey those people should become actors, nobody discriminates anybody for their drugs intake. In fact a lot of people put it in their resume. ‘Knows how to ride a horse, sword work, does accents and knows how to handle cocaine, heroin and sleeping pills’” Louis jokes and thinks it was a good one. Harry doesn’t think so; he just frowns at him like he kicked a puppy.

“They don’t take their recovery so seriously just for people to make lame jokes about it, you know?”

Louis pours himself more wine. This is starting to be the worst date he’s ever had.

_____________________________________________________

Louis was right. Niall is not ugly, with his baby blue eyes, his carefree personality and he LOVES music, just like Louis said. The thing is he didn’t said what genre Niall likes. Liam considers himself a pretty musical guy; he likes almost everything Jazz, Blues, Rap, Electronic music.

Top 40 pop music? Not so much.

“And now that they broke up Selena is making fun of Justin and slacking his music, such an ignorant. The guy is a fucking genius. Do you know how much pressure labels put in the artists? And he still gives really good music and great show, but for real good pop music you have to listen to New Kids on the Block they made the difference for boybands and pop, you know”

“I’m… I, well. I don’t really like pop music all that much?”

Niall drops his fork in the plate like he just said something offensive. Ups?

“Yeah, yeah, of course. You’re one of those guys who listen to New Zeeland tribal music just ‘cause they heard that listening to it makes you smarter or some shit like that, aren’t you?” He raises his voice that even people outside the restaurant can hear him “When would people realize that just because something is popular doesn’t mean is shit?!”

Okay his rant didn’t get listen outside the restaurant but someone heard him in the other end of the table.

“I agree. Liking songs that make you happy shouldn’t be such a problem, not listening to dark obscure lyrics doesn’t make you a bad fan of music” Harry looks down at the table “I read that in a magazine, it was an interview…”

Louis tries to help ‘yeah, well, I met this guy in a photo-shoot…’ but Niall is looking at Harry like he’s the best thing he’s ever seen.

“That’s mine”

Harry looks up to him.

“Excuse me?”

“That’s mine, I said that in an interview the other week”

The table goes silent for a long time. Harry and Niall just looking at each other and Liam has the sensation of been invisible.

“That’s so weird, this is the first time I quote someone”

“Nobody has ever quoted me back to me before”

“Wait a second. Niall? Niall Horan? From One Direction and 5 seconds of summer?”

“Yeah, yes, as I live and breathe, for fucks sakes.”

Louis looks like he wants to say something but he seems to have the same sensation of being invisible so he doesn’t say anything. Harry is so excited he’s talking fast, which is normal speed for everyone else. It’s pretty cute.

“I saw you play a few weeks ago! I knew I’ve seen you before when we got here. I thought you were amazing, you sounded like a young Michael Buble or something. I wrote a song when I got home after your show, I was so excited”

“Holy shit, that’s fucking amazing. Shit, fuck”

There’s not a single awkward silence for the rest of the meal. If Liam or Louis had gotten up and left the restaurant nobody would have notice.

If he hadn’t been blatantly rejected Liam would be happy for Harry. Niall and him laugh at the same jokes, end each other sentences and look at each other like there’s no one else in the world. Louis gives him a look that says ‘I don’t know either’ and Liam eats half of his dessert. That’s what he gets for trying to set him up with a Beiber fan.

_____________________________________________

They don’t leave the restaurant until a waiter subtly kicks them out. It has been the longest dinner Louis has ever been to. He just wants to get in a cab and go home but when they’re out on the street Niall says ‘Hey is that a genuine Fender?’ and drags him to the first shop window he sees.

“Hey, Lou, do you want to fuck Harry?” says Niall nervously. Louis has never seen him like this.

“What? No, I don’t think so, I mean we didn’t really connect and…”

“Because I’m thinking of letting him fuck me, you know? I think he’s fucking amazing”

“Yea? Well, okay. He’s yours but wait a couple of days to call him, yeah? Liam hasn’t gotten over his ex and he’s kind of sensible about the…”

Niall doesn’t let him finish.

“Yeah, sure, mate. I’ll be subtle, don’t worry”

Subtle. Niall. Louis doesn’t want to be a pessimist but he’s known Niall for a long time.

_______________________________________________

As soon as Louis and Harry leave them alone Harry pulls him by the arm and corners him against the wall.

“Hey, if you didn’t like Niall, do you mind if I…?”

Truth to be told he didn’t like Niall, but even if he did, Liam is not sure he would resist the eyes that Harry is giving him right now.

“Ah, no. He's yours, if you want him”

“Is just. I would give him more than soup if I took him home. If you know what I mean”

Liam knows what he means. He’s going to have to bleach his brain to forget it.

“Okay, Harry, awesome. But you should wait a couple of weeks to call him, okay? I know Louis acts like a tough guy but the whole divorce thing has really gotten to him and I think he’s still pretty beaten up about it”

Harry scoffs. Like if the mere thought of him being something less than sensible about this is ridiculous. Okay, Harry is a sensible guy, he can handle this. He says ‘of course’ right before Louis and Niall join them.

A taxi passes next to them and Niall whistles so high to get the driver attention that Liam goes deft for a moment and then everything happens so fast. He hears Niall say ‘Eh! Taxi!’ Harry steps forward and Louis tries to say something but Niall interrupts him ‘Where do you live?’ he asks Harry.

“North”

“Hey, me too”

And before Liam or Louis can blink they’re both in the back of the taxi saying their goodbyes.

“See you later, Liam!”

“I’ll call you, Lou”

Louis looks as confused as he feels. They look at each other and then to the taxi, which is almost out of view. Liam, just to feel better about himself, suggests that maybe they just wanted to share the cab.

“I don’t think so. Niall stole the lube I keep in my jacket in case of emergency”

__________________________________________________________

Less than twenty-four hours later, Louis is talking to Niall on the phone. He’s been telling him about how amazing is Harry, how he’s so interested in things that Niall hasn’t even though like the economy and that when he starts talking about things he cares about his eyes get really big and sparkly and how much he wants to write songs about Harry’s eyes. Louis has never heard him talk about someone like that before; he’s so shocked he doesn’t even mock him.

“I’m so mad at you, Lou”

Louis is looking at the fridge as he talks to him. He wants ice cream, but he’ll end up eating an apple or something healthy.

“Because after so many years of being my friend you finally catch the gay?”

“No, mate. Because after so many years of being your friend you have never told me how awesome gay sex is. You didn’t even give me a blow job! Didn’t I deserve a blow job? A stranger had to come and give me one. I thought we were friends, Louis”

Niall has a weird concept of what a friendship is.

“You could have given me one, you know”

“Ugh, shut up. That’s fucking disgusting”

He doesn’t want to eat an apple. He wants to forget that his best friend stole a guy from him (one he didn’t liked, but still) and that after so many years of saying that love is a joke and doesn’t exist, has left him alone in Singleland to join the army of People In Love. The fucking traitor.

He dials Liam’s number “Hey, Sasquatch. Do you want some ice-cream?” It’s a stupid question. Liam always wants ice cream.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Harry says they’re not really moving in together. Did Niall tell you they’re not moving in together?”
> 
> “Of course he told me that. ‘We’re not moving in together, mate. We just found this awesome huge warehouse and it was just going to be our rehearsal space but we realized we’re going to be there all day every day so we decided to just live there’ “

Liam has seen weird things. Honest to God weird ass things! Okay, yeah, Louis has the judges and ‘On your knees, whore’ and Greek beaches but Liam has that time he and Olly went to a party where it was mandatory to dress up like a character from the Flintstones (Olly went as Bang Bang and Liam as Dino). And that time his next door neighbour had a regression and wouldn’t stop yelling that the Nazis were after her so the police had to climb through his window to get to her apartment.

 So, Liam has seen weird things, but nothing as weird as Harry and Niall’s relationship. What are the odds of two guys, living in London, with the same weird taste in music find each other through some friends and decide to move in together after a month of knowing each other?

 Apparently they are very high (this makes Liam’s dream of marry prince Harry a little bit more realistic), that’s why him and Louis have been looking for a house-warming present the whole afternoon.

“Harry says they’re not really moving in together. Did Niall tell you they’re not moving in together?”

 “Of course he told me that. ‘We’re not moving in together, mate. We just found this awesome huge warehouse and it was just going to be our rehearsal space but we realized we’re going to be there all day every day so we decided to just live there’ “

“So, they’re totally moving in together”

“YES and they’re going to live in a  _loft_ , which is even gayer. Hey, what do you think about this?”

Liam has never bought a gift for a warehouse-warming that is actually a loft where his best friend is not moving in with his boyfriend, but he thinks that plastic guitar are a bit tacky.

“Mmm, I get the whole guitar symbolism and everything, but don’t you think they’ll get mad if we get there with plastic music instruments instead of a  _real_ gift? What about one of those fryers that leave the fat at the bottom? Harry would love one”

Louis has that spark in his eyes that says ‘Ha, ha, I’m going to make fun of Liam’. Liam hates it. The making fun part, the spark in the eyes is kind of pretty.

“Dude. These aren’t plastic instruments. This is Rockband! Is a videogame where people pretend to play an instrument like in a real band”

“But… they already have a real band? Why would we give them something for them to be a fake band?”

“Well, I don’t know. Because they’re _obsessed_  with music?”

Liam thinks about it for a few moments.

“Yeah. You’re right” Louis still has the mocking spark in his eyes “What?”

Louis stands very straight. Is his football challenging posture, the one he uses to make him drink another tequila shoot even when he doesn’t distinguish the Neon letters of the pub, but this time he doesn’t hand him a shoot glass. He hands him a microphone.

“Come on”

“No way”

“Come on, Liiiiam”

“You haven’t heard me sing. I sing… I…. There are no words for the way I sing. I’m sure there are national laws for my way of singing. To forbid it, of course”

“Pleeeeease? I’ll sing to!!”

“Besides, I don’t know any of those rock songs. You know the kind of music I like and this is not it”

“They have Justin Timberlake, you love JT. Let’s sing something of JT”

“You hate Justin Timberlake”

“Not true! JT is awesome, well sometimes. Come on, I’ll start!  _You were my sun, you were my earth…”_

And it’s not fair, it really isn’t. Louis with the microphone in his hands and watching with a crazy happy face that says ‘Come on, Liam. Play with me, please’. And it doesn’t even matter because when Louis start screaming ‘Your bridges were burned, and now it's your turn’ he puts the mic in Liam’s face and he doesn’t have any other choice but join him with ‘To cry’  Louis laughs even harder and Liam keeps singing about someone crying a river and he doesn’t even care that he’s making a fool of himself, he’s only paying attention to the words and Louis voice and Louis laugh and the screen who keeps telling him he’s doing amazing that he doesn’t even notices that Louis stops singing, he stopped singing and he’s looking to the front of the store where the digital cameras are. He gets really serious and says.

“Eleanor”

“ _You told me you lovee me._ What? What’s going on?”

“Eleanor. That’s Eleanor and her yoga instructor”

Liam looks to the front and he sees them. A girl with long brown hair and a guy with orange hair that are watching them and not making any attempt to pretend they haven’t seen them. They’re walking towards them holding hands. Liam drops the microphone. Louis doesn’t even move. He has become a salt statue; any false movement and he’ll come down in pieces.

“Hi, Louis” Eleanor says. Her eyes look honest and the sadness in her voice sounds genuine. Liam is pretty sure he’ll like her if he didn’t have to hate her.

“Hello”

Liam decides to give them space so they can have their awkward conversation more privately. He’s reading the review on the videogames when a voice right next to him says

“Excuse me”

And Liam almost has a heart attack because what’s with this guy? Does he appears or something?

“I’m Ed” The evil yoga instructor (that Liam has decided he hates because he’s a good friend) says extending his hand. Liam wants to do something that shows he’s in Louis corner but Karen Payne’s good upraising betray him and he shakes his hand.

“Erm. Liam”

The evil yoga instructor (he refuses to use his name) shakes his hand like the books says you should, firm but not too much. He looks at his eyes with the intensity of vegans, anorexics and people whose starving in general.

“I know Louis is not gonna talk to me because his hatred for me hinders any relationship we could have, but he’ll listen to you. Tell him to consider doing tai-chi to purify his soul. It does wonders for the body as well.”

Liam wants to tell him that that is the stupidest thing he’s ever heard and what makes him think he can make Louis do something like that? He can’t even make him rinse the dishes before he puts them in the dishwasher, but he doesn’t say anything just nods dumbly until Louis appears by his left and grabs his arm.

“We’re leaving”

“We’re not gonna by the...”

“LET’S GO”

They end up buying the fryer that leaves the fat at the bottom in another store. Louis doesn’t say a word.

____________________________________

He CAN’T control it. He tries, he really does, but he can’t. He’s having all this flashbacks, all this visions, this memories of Eleanor that have come out like a can of worms, unexpected and horrifying. Him and Eleanor spending Sunday morning in bed, the smell of her skin after a shower, a day on the beach; picking a bed together and them undoing it a thousand times; all the fights he thought they were going to be worth it in the end. That time they went to Greece and Eleanor got her shoulders sunburnt and they made love in the pool.

 And then she left him and he wants to think that ‘life is like that’ and move on but what the fuck? What about the sensation of having lost so many years? What the fuck? Fucking yoga instructor. Louis sleeps with all these people but he doesn’t have anyone who holds his hand in the camera section of Best Buy. And he’s handsome, the son of a bitch. He can even hold an erection for seven hours, Louis bets.

“Lou? Where are you, mate?”

“What?”

Niall is looking at him. Harry is looking at him. Liam is looking at him and his look says ‘Behave’. That look gives him nauseas, what does Liam knows about making a fool of himself in front of his ex singing JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE? Of all the times he could run into her. His fucking luck, seriously.

Niall isn’t just looking at him. He’s talking.

“I’m asking you, if you think that Harry is right and I should get rid of the beer can tower? Or if you think that Harry should fuck off and leave the beer can tower alone because it has cost me lots of hang overs and has a special place in my heart and it goes perfectly with the living room?”

Harry intervenes. Arguing with Niall like the people who just got together argues. They don’t know that one day they’ll end up trying to rip each other hearts out.

“Niall, a beer can tower doesn’t go perfectly with anything. This is not an American frat house”

“Liam, tell your friend that he can’t throw my youth away like it’s trash”

Liam looks at Niall and then at Harry. He looks like he’ll rather mediate in the Middle East than between a gay couple with a love for pop ballad songs.

“I don’t know” He says, “It really doesn’t go very well with the living room, you know”

Harry smiles, a smile that says ‘You see, darling?’ Louis thinks about Eleanor and her ‘you see, darlings’ and her ‘you’re okay, darling’ and her ‘I’m living you for another guy, darling’ He’s having trouble breathing. Niall is snorting. He searches for his eyes and he says ‘Defend me, come on’ and Louis thinks about his honeymoon and the laugh attack him and Eleanor had watching Mexican soap operas at three in the morning naked like animals.

“I don’t know, is a beer can tower. It’s been in all of Niall’s houses”

It’s not a great argument, but Niall interprets it like ‘ this is a relic and we should totally keep it’ So he screams and gets mad and when Harry sees that he’s really upset he tells him that that is the childish thing he’s ever seen and that it’s a monument to alcoholism.

“Hey” Niall says, “I’m not an alcoholic, I’m Irish”

“No one in Ireland thinks they’re alcoholic” Harry says.

Something happens inside of Louis. Something that has to do with discussions and make out sex. Something inside of him snaps. And when the discussion keeps going and going and going, he snaps.

“WHO THE FUCK CARE ABOUT THE FUCKING CAN TOWER?! For the love of God, Niall. That is the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. No one sees it and thinks ‘fuck, what a beautiful example of a modern art’ they look at it and think ‘what a fucking pig, I bet this guy has herpes’ and you wanna know what’s the worst thing? It doesn’t even matter! Doesn’t matter how ugly that thing is because sooner or later you’re going to end up fighting who gets this disgusting thing that smells like a frat house and a divorce lawyer is going to charge you a fucking load of pounds by the hour just to decide who gets it. And that day neither one of you is going to think they won because you’re going to feel like you lost the best years of your life and after all of that is over ONE OF YOU I GOING TO HAVE TO CARRY THE FUCKING BEER CAN TOWER”

When he finishes his rant his throat feels a little dried. Niall is looking at him a little bit hurt.

“I thought you liked it”

“I WAS TRYING TO BE NICE!”

He turns and leaves without looking back. By the corner of his eye he sees Liam and he’s looking at him with this look of disappointment.

‘Stop expecting something more’ he wants to tell him ‘this is as good as it gets’

Unfortunately he tells him worst things.

_____________________________

Liam has seen Louis in a bad mood. The first time it was a shock. He had a party in his apartment with lots of alcohol in cups and Liam end up sleeping in his couch, so he got to see Louis BC (before caffeine). It wasn’t a very nice experience and by not very nice he means it was really horrifying and he’ll like to never see it again. Louis BC is a little grumpy monster, with pillow marks on his face, crazy hair and with the same manners of someone who has being raised by wolves, lives in a cabin in the woods and makes everyone calls him the hermit.

The Louis he has in front of him is much, much worse.

He doesn’t have the excuse of lacking of the legal stimulant and he doesn’t have the right to hurt his friends just because he has been hurt too. Life is not about that, just throw punches hurting everyone around you. He tries to explain this to him, softly and slowly. But when he finds him sitting in the stairs chain smoking and looking like a caged animal he can’t do softly or slowly.

“Are you okay?”

“Do I look okay?”

No, he doesn’t. He looks like a guy who shits where he eats and thinks his feeling are much important that the ones around him.

“It’s not like you didn’t knew she was with him”

Shit. If looks could kill.

“Well, excuse me if I offended you with my feelings. It’s those things that normal people have, I don’t know if you’ve heard about them”

Huh. What?

“What does that supposed to mean?”

The cigarette goes flying when Louis gets on his feet.

“I don’t know, Liam, maybe it means that not everyone is as good actor as you. Not all of us have the perfect smile and crinkly eyes to hide behind them. How are you doing? Do you really care that you broke up with Olly or are you that really good actor?”

For some reason the bit about the crinkly eyes stings him the most.

“Olly and I broke up. I  _got over it._ It’s an interesting concept, you should try it sometimes Louis. If it’s over it’s over. Period.”

Louis takes a step forward. He challenges with his posture.

“So get over it, right?” Louis says “Tell me something, Liam. Have you slept with anyone since the banker left you?”

Financial adviser. And he didn’t  _leave him._ They didn’t have a future. He would explain it to Louis if he didn’t want to punch him in the face. He hadn’t wanted to punch someone so hard in his life. He doesn’t get angry very often but when he does he gets enraged.

 

“Is there anyone you haven’t slept with since Eleanor  _left you?_ I don’t think there’s anyone left in London you could go to Ireland. I heard there’s a free ferry! You could go in the morning fuck your way until the afternoon and get home for dinner! Maybe that way you could feel better, sleeping with people that you don’t care and you just keep lying to. So far it has been working so fine, it’s not like you just yell at your best friend just because he had the guts to try something you failed at!”

 

A part of him thinks he’s trying to defend himself of something. Maybe he doesn’t like that Louis sees him like that, like the guy who handles his break ups pretending he doesn’t have any feelings. Maybe is that. Or maybe is the fact that he can’t stand that Louis,  _Louis,_ who could have everything that he wanted if he just tried a little instead of moaning and bitching of everything he’s not, he  _can’t stand it._ If he was any other people it wouldn’t bother him but is different with Louis, because he’s smarter than he thinks and more beautiful than he should be and he’s one of the best people he knows and doesn’t deserve to hurt himself so much just because Eleanor couldn’t see it. He doesn’t deserve it and it drives Liam insane that he thinks he does.

So he yells at him. Two inches away from his face. And then he shuts up, breathing heavy and with his throat dry.

Waiting for Louis to start yelling at him and wondering if he just fucked up something he doesn’t want to lose.

But nothing happens.

“You’re right”

“I am? I mean, I know I am.”

They stay quiet just looking at each other. Louis looks uncomfortable and small.

“I’m sorry” He says. And, oh God, Liam is sorry too.

“Me too”

They stand there staring at each other for almost a minute when Liam says ‘For Christ sakes’ and reacts like he would if Louis was one of his other friends and hugs him. He doesn’t know what he was thinking when it was obvious that Louis needed a hug since the beginning. He doesn’t know why it took him so long to do it, because in that minute that they spend just looking at each other it looked like Louis wanted to tell him something or do something…

“Liam, Liam. Let me go, I can’t breathe”

Liam lets him go. He can get a little intense about his hugs.

“I’m sorry”

He doesn’t feel all that sorry, really. Louis is blushing and making someone who fucks judges with sex swings blush is a big accomplishment. Liam tells him, he can’t help it.

“You’re blushing”

Louis smacks him in the stomach really hard.

“You’re sweating, you fucking pig” 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I have no idea. I call him ‘He cries when he comes’”
> 
> “See? Bad memory”
> 
> “I have a good memory for the things that matter.”
> 
> Liam stays quiet. It’s a really long silence like he’s getting ready to say something life changing.

It might seem incredible, but sometimes there are days that don’t end up with beers or drinks. Especially if it has been raining for three days and can’t get out of the house because a tropical storm is happening.

 

“It’s not a tropical storm, Liam. This is London, we don’t have those things”

 

The day might not end up with beers but they always call each other at the end of the day.

 

“It’s a tropical storm, Lou. Apparently they can happen here too. It’s the global warming fault, they said so this morning on the Breakfast show with Grimmy”

 

“If you believe what they say on that show we have a problem. No wait delete that, if you hear that show we have a problem.”

 

He hears him laugh and then a sucking noise. It’s… disturbing.

 

“What are you doing? Are you talking to me while someone is sucking you? That’s really kinky, I’m proud.”

 

“No, you idiot. I’m eating ice cream and watching TV.”

 

Louis gets comfier on his bed and gets ready to change channels.

 

“What are you watching?”

 

“Love Actually. On the Cosmo channel”

 

“I’m not going to say anything about the channel because I already made fun of your entertainment choices and two jokes about that is too easy, even for me.”

 

“Yeah, okay.”

 

“But if I hadn’t say anything about the radio thing I’ll totally bully you about this.”

 

Apparently Liam is ignoring him. Or maybe Liam is reading his mind because he tells him something completely different than what they were talking but exactly what he wants to know.

 

“It’s the part with the guy with the signs”

 

Poor guy. The girl who gets with Hugh Grant will be remembered like ‘the chubby girl that fucks the prime minister’. The Portuguese waitress will be remembered like ‘the skinny girl that fucks Colin Firth’ but this poor bastard will always be remembered like ‘the guy that embarrassed himself with the signs and didn’t fuck Keira Knightley’.

 

“What would you do, Li? Would you stay with the black guy who was super hot or the guy who thinks your perfect just the way you are but that could have ruined his best friend marriage just to close a chapter in his life?”

 

Louis hears him chew. How can you chew ice cream? No one knows, but Liam does it.

 

“He didn’t want to ruin his friend marriage, and he didn’t do that just for that. Do you think he did it just for that?”

 

“I don’t. You said that.”

 

“Me? When?”

 

“On our first trip together. When you looked like an a ass and I was… nah I was just as hot”

 

“I don’t remember”

 

“Me being just as hot?”

 

Condescend tone in three, two, one…

 

“Yes, Louis, you being just as hot, exactly.”

 

Ding, ding.

 

“You said that he did that to close a chapter in his life, to accept she wasn’t for him and that she kisses him because she already found true love with her husband and she feels sorry he hasn’t found it yet”

 

The noise of the spoon scraping the ice cream bin has stopped. Liam must be REALLY surprised.

 

“I can’t believe you remember that”

 

“I have a good memory”

 

“That’s not true. What’s the name of the guy you banged last week?”

 

He knows it, he does! It was something like Da… David? Daniel? Damian! Maybe he had a nickname like Dan. Shit, he doesn’t remember.

 

“I have no idea. I call him ‘He cries when he comes’”

“See? Bad memory”

 

“I have a good memory for the things that matter.”

 

Liam stays quiet. It’s a really long silence like he’s getting ready to say something life changing.

 

“I’m going to bed.”

 

Maybe not.

 

“Don’t you wanna watch the whole thing?”

 

“Nah, it’s the part when Alan Rickman buys the necklace for his whore of a secretary, I can’t watch that part.”

 

“But he doesn’t do anything in the end!”

 

“I know, but no one does that to Emma Thompson”

 

“Okaaaay, whatever you say. Wanna go for lunch tomorrow?”

 

“Can’t. I’m meeting Andy tomorrow, he wants to set me up with a guy.”

 

“I don’t get why you still going out with the guys Andy sets you up with. Are you trying to win heaven having the worst dates in the world or something?”

 

Liam laughs. Soft and close, just at the other side of the phone.

 

“I’ll call you for dinner.”

 

“Call me.”

 

“Good night, Lou.”

 

He hates when other people call him Lou.

 

“Good night, Li.”

 

He watches the whole movie.

 

Liam has really low hopes about the guy Andy wants to set him up with. In fact, giving the guys Andy has introduce him to, he would be happy with a guy who doesn’t floss his teeth with a hair after he’s done with his dish. His expectations are so low that when he meets Zayn he’s so surprised he doesn’t know what to say. He spends a whole minute looking for the hidden camera because this is just not happening.

 

“You must be Liam” Liam nods like an idiot while Zayn shakes his hand “Taylor told me you were hot, but oh my god she didn’t said how hot”

 

Okay, the Taylor thing explains it. It’s impossible Andy has a friend like this. Handsome, charming, face like a god and the most incredible job in the world.

 

“You’re lying”

 

“I swear to God. I thought you knew I write for Time Out.”

 

“Yeah, Andy told me that. He didn’t tell me you were a food critic for Time Out.”

 

Zayn smiles and Liam has a vision of him dress in a tux waiting on the altar. What a smile, Jesus Christ.

 

“Do you like to eat, Liam?”

 

It’s obviously the dumbest question he’s ever heard. He spends so long explaining how much he like to eat he forgets to call Louis for dinner. Instead their lunch becomes supper then dinner then they spend the night eating each other.

 

 

August in London is sweating 24/7, smell of people everywhere and the traffic worse than usual, hell on earth. Andy, bless his hearth (once in a while), somehow got free tickets for a very exclusive spa with giant pools where waitresses bring you drinks with little umbrellas on them.

 

Louis has always hated PDA. He really does. He doesn’t get how people can make out in the tube, or a bar or a bank.

 

Or in giant pools where waitresses bring you drinks with little umbrellas on them.

 

He just doesn’t like PDA, it doesn’t have anything to do with Liam. Liam and that guy, Zayn-with-a-Y. That guy who, Louis is totally sure, has forged his credentials as a food critic and is actually a model. Louis is a model he recognise another when he sees one. You can’t be a food critic and have that body, no fucking way.

 

“He specializes in healthy food, Louis. He’s writing a guide about the healthiest restaurants in London. It’s amazing! I didn’t even know one and he’s writing a whole guide!”

 

Liam told him this two days, TWO DAYS, after meeting Zayn-with-a-Y. Two days where Louis knows he didn’t just eat in fancy restaurants. It’s not like he minds, really. He’s actually happy for Liam. God knows he needed a good fuck. But, two days! Two days where Liam didn’t answer his phone or texts. It wasn’t like Liam at all and Louis was about to start calling hospitals around London looking for amnesiac patients or call the police to report an alien abduction. Or maybe just knocking on Liam’s apartment door.

 

It happened to be amnesia. Post-orgasmic amnesia.

 

And now they’re in the pool, with Liam with his back to the wall and Zayn between his legs eating each other faces. It’s not like all of this bothers Louis, really, it’s just that it appears that the next step for them it’s to ask the life guard for a condom.

 

By the way the life guard is looking at them from his spot, Louis thinks he would actually give them the whole box and ask them if he can watch. Those shorts give everything away.

 

Andy interrupts his chain of thought when he thanks the waitress for their drinks and tells her to ‘keep the change, beautiful’. Sometimes Louis wonders why Taylor’s still with him.

 

“Do you really think he’s all that great?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“That Zayn guy”

 

“Look, Louis, I don’t like dick, but the way I see it, skinny, face like a fucking god, big cock: Gay Man of the Century”

 

“How do you know he has a big cock?”

 

“Taylor did a photo shoot with him once. He started making money as a model”

 

He knew it, he fucking knew it.

 

For the next six weeks he watches more porn that Liam’s face.

 

Harry comes to newspaper and asks him for lunch on Friday. Liam just finished a story that was driving crazy, his boss congratulated him and he’s happy so he has two brownies for dessert. Zayn makes him eat healthy he’s allowed.

 

“Liam be straight with me. Is this a typical rebound guy or do I have to start thinking what I’m going to sing on your wedding?”

 

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Don’t tell me you’re gonna get married and you’re not gonna let me sing on your wedding?”

 

Wedding. With Zayn?

 

“We’ve only been dating for a little bit over a month, Harry.”

 

“So he’s rebound.”

 

“How would I know in a month?”

 

Harry snorts.

 

“Liam, come on. You had been dating Olly for two days when you had me on the phone for two hours telling me hoy beautiful his eyes were and how they change color with the sun. What color are Zayn’s eyes?”

 

Brown, dark brown? They’re like light brown. Or are they green? Maybe he has those eyes that change color with the sun.

 

“He has…” Harry is looking him with a knowing smirk and Liam can’t lie to him “he has the eyes of a rebound guy, ok? But you could had let me enjoy the rebound sex for a little longer.”

 

The waiter asks them if they’ll want anything else. Liam asks for the chocolate cake with whipped cream and he goes home with a satisfied stomach and the vague sensation that he’s cheating on Zayn by admitting he doesn’t see himself with him in six months time. On his walk home he stops in a magazine stand and buy lots of them for when he gets there.

 

He regrets buying OUT when he gets to page number 10.

 

Today is what people called a good day. If someone would ask Louis how a great day looks like he would point to the calendar and say ‘like that’. His photo shoot ended sooner that he expected and the make-up artist was this tiny pretty woman with a ridiculous name, Louis-call-me-Lou, that laughs a lot and has a beautiful daughter. They finished sooner than expected so they go out for coffee afterwards and end up talking about the possibility of Louis auditioning for a play that some friend of hers is doing. The plot seems cool and when he gets home he feels happy and even, he dares to say, optimistic.

 

His phone starts to ring when he’s in the shower. “They’ll leave a message” he thinks, it starts to ring again when he’s washing his hair and again when he’s getting out of the shower, he starts to worry and when it rings for a forth time he answers immediately.

 

Is Liam.

 

“He’s getting married! Can you believe it? He leaves me and now he’s getting married!”

 

Fuck. Zayn? _I knew we shouldn’t trust him._

“Zayn? With who?”

 

“Not him. Olly! He’s getting married to a fucking environment lawyer!”

 

Liam doesn’t say ‘come’ but Louis is out of his apartment in less than a minute. He can’t find any clean pants so he just put on some old jeans. He get’s to Liam’s apartment with his glasses on, hair a mess and wanting to know how Liam is doing.

 

The answer is pretty bad. And very drunk.

 

He opens his door and stays there, he looks in shock. Before Louis can say something stupid (like asking him how he’s doing) Liam reacts and says ‘KENSINGTON!’

 

“What?”

 

“HE’S GETTING MARRIED IN KENSINGTON!”

 

It’s a very weird day and, in Liam’s defence, he blames the tequila because that’s the only thing he has in his flat. The tequila, the FOUR PAGE cover in the OUT magazine and a weird oppression in his chest. He thought he was over it, he really did. But the fact that he called Louis 35 times and that he drank half the bottle of tequila probably means that he isn’t. His brain feels really slow and that’s probably why he just stands in his door for about 20 seconds just looking. Louis (if he’s really here and not an hallucination of his drunk brain) gets to his home panting, with glasses, a shirt that has seen better days and ratty jeans that don’t leave much for the imagination. Liam wants to tell him ‘ are you kidding? You look like the beginning of a porn movie’ but then the tequila helps him and he shouts.

 

“HE’S GETTING MARRIED IN KENSINGTON!”

 

Louis closes the door behind him. Liam hugs the bottle.

 

“There’s a whole page on how proud his family that he finally decided to live his life with out any ambiguities. That’s the expression they used, can you believe it? He introduced me to his granny like I was his gardener. He doesn’t even have a garden!”

 

The magazine is on a table in the living room. Louis skims over it, he looks worried but not really surprised.

 

“That lawyer is way uglier than you and a ecologist. He’s probably a vegan; they’ll serve tofu in the reception. Do you really want your first toast to be with a fermented soya juice? Come on, you’re the clear winner here.”

 

He really appreciates what Louis is trying to do (he should use his glasses more often) but that’s not the point and they both know it.

 

“I always thought he just didn’t wanted to come out of the closet, he just didn’t wanted to come out for me.”

 

Louis makes a hurt expression. Like he doesn’t want to see him like this but doesn’t know what to do. Liam is grieving for the first time and he wants to cry. This sucks, he prefers the anger or the denial.

 

“And now he meets this guy in a few months. He was supposed to be a rebound guy, like Zayn, not the one.”

 

“Zayn is rebound?”

 

That’s a weird question; Liam has to much tequila in his blood stream and doesn’t want to think about it. He throws himself in the bed because suddenly everything is spinning.

 

“Is it me? Am I to difficult?”

 

Louis sits besides him. He’s wearing flip-flops, they’re pretty. He has pretty feet. He probably has a gorgeous spleen and a liver for a magazine.

 

“You’re a challenge.”

 

“I’m hyperactive.”

 

“But patient.”

 

“My dogs shed too much hair.”

 

“But they always wave their tail when they see me.”

 

“I’m gonna die alone! People will find my death body for the smell!”

 

“You’re not gonna die alone. When Taylor dumps him Andy is going to move in with you.”

 

It’s so unfair that he makes him laugh. He’s tearing up, snots all over the place and he’s laughing, Louis has no right to make him laugh.

 

“Come here, come on.”

 

Liam goes.

 

Louis is a good hugger and he smells incredible. From there on Liam blames the alcohol.

 

What? Many leaders have done the same thing.

 

Niall likes rock and roll, pop music, saturated fat and Harry. He doesn’t like when his soccer team loses, disco music and when the phone rings before 10 a.m. When the damn thing doesn’t shut up, opens one eye, he hears Harry mumbling and sees that it’s only 8 in the morning, he’s gonna kill whoever is on the other side. It’s Saturday.

 

“I’m going to fucking kill you, Louis. I swear to God.”

 

“Liam fucks like an animal.”

 

Niall is not a morning person (Harry would say that that is a statement) but right now his brain goes from cero to a hundred in point two seconds.

 

“Say that again.”

 

Louis sounds nervous. And he’s making pauses while he speaks which means he’s smoking, at eight in the morning.

 

“Like an animal, I swear to God. Did you imagine that? Fuck, who would have thought.”

 

Niall, like the smart person he thinks he is, has always thought that Louis and Liam didn’t look at each other like a normal person looks at a friend, or a brother, or a cousin but like two guys that would like to lick each other sweat. But this is a little bit unexpected.

 

“Wait, hold on. Say that again.”

 

“What the fuck, Niall? Are you still sleep? I need you awake for this, do you hear me? This is a crisis; I fucked Liam and left while he was sleeping! So take your head out of Harry’s ass and pay attention to me. I’m your fucking best friend!”

 

He says all of this without taking a breath.

 

“I thought Liam was your best friend now.”

He hears him snorting the smoke.

 

“Not anymore! If you were listening you would have heard that we fucked all night last night! Good God, when I saw him naked I thought I was hallucinating. He’s always eating, it’s not fair. I won’t tell you what’s under his shirt because you wouldn’t believe me and what’s inside his jeans, we shouldn’t talk about it either, you would be traumatized.”

 

Niall doesn’t know what to say. Harry asks ‘is that Louis?’ with sleepy eyes; he wants to run his hands over Harry’s hair. Before he even answers him, his phone starts ringing in his nightstand. Harry looks at the screen and mumbles ‘ is Liam’ while Louis’s still freaking out on the other side of the phone.

 

“… I didn’t even saw it coming, I swear. One moment he’s crying about that fucktard that doesn’t have a prostate is with other guy and the next he’s sucking my neck. What was I supposed to do?”

 

“No, I mean, seriously. What was I supposed to do?”

 

Harry is good in emotional crisis. The guys in his addiction centre have stories about someone dumping them so Harry has had practice. He just wished he wouldn’t have to hear them at eight in the morning on a Saturday when the guy who left one of his best friends, after 10 years of sexual tension, alone in bed is talking to Niall five inches away from him.

 

“Drink less tequila for starters! God, he wasn’t wearing underwear. I put my hands in his jeans and he was there! Just there! And you know what’s the worst thing? Of course you don’t, but I’m gonna tell you anyways. The worst thing is that I’m not really sure it was consensual, because I’m almost sure it was but we didn’t talk about it and now I’m awake and he’s gone and it’s like, what? Eight? Nobody has anything important to do at eight in the morning on a Saturday.  Did you have anything to do?”

 

“Well, Li. I was sleeping.”

 

“See? Sleep! That’s what normal people do at this hour. But he didn’t. He left. This means it was a mistake, obviously.”

 

Harry has seen the way Liam looks at Louis and is the closest thing to how people look at each other in the movies. So he doesn’t have a clue if it was a mistake.

 

“If you thinks so then maybe is true.”

 

Silence on the other side.

 

“He smelled so good, you know? He looked so good, he had just got out of the shower and he was wearing glasses and he looked, I don’t know, vulnerable and… he wasn’t wearing any underwear. And it was… oh my god, Harry, I don’t even know how to explain it.”

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> October is a really bad time for being a coward in London. Louis Tomlinson knows this because he’s a coward.

“A mistake. Clearly. That’s what it was, right? A mistake.”

 

“You’re asking me?”

 

Even when Niall whines that he doesn’t like to get up of bed on Saturdays before noon he agreed to meet for coffee in a place far away from Liam’s flat. Louis’s not sure what he’ll tell him if he runs into him. He’s also not sure if talking about this with Niall is a good idea either, this is the kind of thing he’ll talk to Liam about, but obviously he can’t go to him because your best friend isn’t the best go to guy when you sleep with your best friend. Everything is too complicated. Louis needs an ibuprofen.

 

“He’s getting married in Kensington, you know?”

 

“Liam?!”

 

“No, you fucking idiot. His ex, for Christ sake, pay attention. He called me last night because his ex is getting married to a yuppie that wants to save the planet or some bullshit. They were in the Out magazine, apparently Olly’s parents know someone and they getting married in Kensignton. Liam is heartbroken.”

 

“His ex?”

 

“OH MY GOD, NIALL. Drink your fucking coffee, you’re useless.”

 

Niall drinks his coffee, when he’s in his second he starts to understand what he’s been told.

 

“So Liam called you to tell you about this guy who fucked him and left him and then you fucked him and left him.”

 

Louis is regretting giving him all that coffee now.

 

“I wasn’t planning on fucking him, alright. I didn’t even do anything, I swear to God. We were hugging, he was crying telling me how he was gonna die alone or some shit and all of the sudden he’s eating my ass.”

 

Niall looks a little sick. He has a face that says ‘TMI’ that last a second and then he puts a face that says ‘Really?’

 

“Liam? Really? He looks like the type of guy who, I don’t know, likes to light candles, do it eye to eye and cuddling after.”

 

They were in bed. Just hugging and the Louis started to feel something wet on his neck. At first he thought they were tears and then he started to feel Liam’s tongue traveling from his neck to his ear. Louis tried to stop him, he thinks. He would have stopped him but when he tried to say something Liam put his tongue in Louis mouth kissing him like it was going out of style. Liam looked huge; Louis had never noticed how his hands could hold his head with just the fingertips. Liam was growling, he remembers that. Liam was growling and moaning and looked like he didn’t want to be stopped. He wanted something from Louis and he was gonna get it. He was a different Liam; his Liam always makes a face when he tells him about guys Louis blows in restrooms so Louis always thought he was bit useless in the bedroom. But apparently the face was because he did that in restrooms and not about the blowjobs because…

 

 

Just, wow.

 

Liam didn’t just eat his ass last night. Liam ate his ass, ordered him around like ‘get in all fours’ and ‘stick your ass out’ and two fingers in and ‘give it to me, Louis. Just like that, give me more’. It was a great fuck, a little dirty, little clumsy and little bit desperate. He made him beg and made him fuck himself in his fingers and when he thought he was gonna come like that Liam said ‘condoms’ and then they kissed so much that his lips still feel raw. Louis saw him take the condom out of the box and felt his neck heating. A heat that went through all his body when Liam give him the wrapper and thought ‘I’m gonna fuck Liam’ then he heard him say ‘put it on me’ and thought ‘Oh my God, Liam is gonna fuck me’. It was an order and Louis couldn’t have resisted, even if he wanted and he didn’t want to because Liam was saying ‘put it on me so I can fuck your brains out’. And he did, he fucked him against the mattress while he kissed him and whispered in his ear ‘do you like it like this? We can do it whoever you like until you’ve come so much that you can’t move’

 

“Niall, seriously. What part of ‘Liam fucks like an animal’ haven’t you get?”

 

They spent the whole night fucking until they couldn’t do it anymore and now he needsthat Liam tells him that nothing has changed, that he didn’t screw up, that he can keep calling him every Sunday morning and that he can still have him every day, for the rest of his life. He _needs_ it.

\--

 

Liam knows this is bad when Harry agrees to meet him in a McDonalds.

 

Harry hates McDonalds, he says that they’re a corrupted company full of hypocrisy that don’t care about the life of their employers, but when Liam says ‘I need McDonalds, Harry’ he meets him there because corrupted or not they have the best hash browns.

 

As soon as his hangover has diminished a little that first thing that pops into his head is that it was a mistake.

 

“It was a mistake”

 

Harry raises an eyebrow behind his sunglasses. He told Liam he’s gonna keep them on because his face looks a mess because he made him get up very early on a Saturday, but actually is because he doesn’t want that anyone see him here, he has a reputation to uphold.

 

“Was it a mistake ‘I shouldn’t have done that’ or like ‘It was a horrible shag, I wish I had never out my cock out because it would have been better to jerk off thinking about Christian Bell’?”

 

“What? How could this have been a mistake like that? IS LOUIS, Have you actually seen him? Louis, that guy who looks like a model BECAUSE HE IS ONE? Beautiful blue eyes, brown hair that shines brighter when the sun is hitting it, mouth like a god, he has freckles in his neck that form a triangle…”

 

“Wait, you’ve noticed the moles on his neck?”

 

“Freckles, not moles. FRECKLES. And I kissed his neck for like forty minutes, Harry, I could probably draw a map” He takes a bite of his sandwich “He has a neck that I could spend hours sucking and… I’m getting out of topic. Why are letting me do it? Do you think it was a mistake?”

 

“I don’t know what to tell you, Liam, I still don’t understand how did you end up…”

 

“Because I was sad and drunk and I called him, and he came running and he said exactly what I needed to hear, like he always does. And we hugged and I was very drunk and he smelled so good, Harry, like that soap he always uses in the gym. Do you know which one I’m talking about?”

 

“No.”

 

“The one that smells like hazelnuts, he just smelled incredible. Clean and like Louis and like hazelnuts.”

 

And he just had to taste him. Just a little bit. He had to put his tongue in his neck then in his ear and then his mouth, just to see if he tasted as good as he smelled, and then Louis made this sound, like a mewl, and he kissed him back. And Liam was no longer thinking about Kensington or Olly, the only thing in his mind was ‘Do that sound again, I want you to make that sound again and again, I wanna know every sound you make’. He put his hand in Louis jeans and he found his cock half hard and Louis made that sound again and said ‘Liam, please’ and Liam lost touch with reality and when he got it back Louis was in all fours fucking himself on his fingers, groaning and shaking and Liam has never wanted anything in his life as much as he wanted Louis in that moment. Ever. He fucked him while he kissed him and he came so hard panting his name and when it was over the first thing he saw was the marks he left in Louis neck and his brain left the building _again_ so he had to start all over again. He licked his stomach until he got to his cock and put it in his mouth while it was still soft just to feel it filled up in his mouth. Louis made a sound of protest but Liam didn’t want to stop. He didn’t stopped all night and they had amazing shags and maybe…

 

“Do you think he felt like I forced him? Do you think like he tried to stop me and I didn’t?”

 

“Liam, when you started to kiss him he might have tried. But, trust me, when you fuck the same guy three times in a round, he wanted it.”

 

Liam puts his sandwich in the table.

 

“But then… if he didn’t just pity fucked me, if he wanted it to… then why did he left that way?”

 

Harry doesn’t look up from his plate. He doesn’t think he can look at Liam in the eyes.

 

“Is Louis, Liam. That’s what Louis does, you should know this.”

 

 _‘That’s with the others’_ , he thinks, _‘with the ones who don’t matter’._

 

_‘Not with me’._

_‘No, I’m just like them’._

He doesn’t feel like finishing his sandwich anymore.

\---

 

October is a really bad time for being a coward in London. Louis Tomlinson knows this because he’s a coward. When he finished his breakfast with Niall he goes to his apartment and straight to his laptop. He’s gonna skype Liam, make a few jokes, ask him to meet him for lunch, tell him that he hopes he’s feeling better, tell him he had to ran away in the morning because he had an important meeting with his agent, a typical call between friends, hahaha everything fixed. If he was brave he would have done all of that, but he isn’t. He stays in front of his laptop for about twenty minutes until he sees that Liam is online.

 

There are only a few worse things that running away from your best friend’s bed after a night of earth shuttering sex. Using skype to make excuses is maybe one of them.

 

He tells him everything in one go, the meeting with the agent, the feeling better and he also tells him ‘Niall and Harry are playing in a bar downtown, wanna go together?’ and feels like the biggest piece of shit. He hits enter and hopes for the best.

 

His heart stops when he sees the dots indicating Liam is typing.

 

“Ok.”

 

And that’s it.

 

He showers thinking that it’s not so bad, not the usual. But it’s okay. They’re gonna go to a party, together. He should have called him, hear his voice, make some jokes, he would feel better. Maybe Liam thinks is a mistake too.

 

“I hope I’m the first to say it.”

 

The concert is in the ugliest bar in London. Liam text him to say he’s gonna be late, Louis doesn’t pay that much attention to it. He orders Nachos, double cheese because Liam likes them that way and waits. When he gets there he’s taller and more handsome that what Louis remembers. He looks tired and he looks amazing. He lights up when he sees the nachos but is doesn’t last.

 

“What happened the other day was a mistake.”

 

That’s exactly what Louis wanted to hear. Hearing it makes his insides turn them selves. He got food poisoning one, this feels like that.

 

“Yeah, it was one of those mistakes that… happen.”

 

“Yeah, that.”

 

They hear the concert in silence. Is good. At the end Niall dedicates them a song.

 

“To Liam and Louis, because neither one could make me or Harry get a stiffy for them, that’s why we’re here tonight.”

 

That’s nice, in a very Niall way. Very romantic. Louis drinks too much that night and goes home. Alone. Liam left earlier, when Louis wasn’t looking, without saying good-bye.

\---

In the matter of guys who run away the morning after, Louis is the highest authority, but Louis is not someone he can talk to so Liam calls the next best thing.

 

 

“I don’t know Li, maybe he was telling the truth and he has a thing with his agent.”

 

“It was eight a.m. on a Saturday, Andy. The only reason Louis would see his agent at eight on a Saturday it’ll be because the guy is in an after and doesn’t know his way back to his house” He takes a sip of his smothie it leaves a chocolate moustache in his upper lip, he doesn’t clean it. He feels like shit. “No, he just took off. He took off at eight a.m. and the he made a stupid excuse and he told me over skype! It’s humiliating.”

 

“Then why did you go with him to the concert?”

 

“Because I wanted to tell him that it was a mistake and that I was sorry. But there he was with his beard and his shirt and a beer and I thought ‘you know what, you’re my best friend, you came three times and then you left me. I’m not gonna apologize’.”

 

“Wait a minute. What do you mean with ‘best friend’?”

 

“Second best friend.”

 

“Oh. Okay. Hold on. Three times? You’re a fucking beast! I’m so proud.”

 

“Yeah, whatever. The thing is I said ‘it was a mistake’ and he said ‘ yeah, it was’ and that was it, can you believe it? Just like that!”

 

“But… Liam, you think it was a mistake, right? He thinking the same thing should be a good thing, right?”

 

“Yeah, but… but…” He doesn’t even know how to explain it; Liam doesn’t really understand it either. “The fucker always do the opposite of what I want him to do, and he agrees with me on this, humiliating, I tell you, this is what it is. Humiliating.”

 

“Yeah, okay. Well I don’t really know if this was a mistake or not but one thing I do know, if you made him come three times the minimum he could have done was stay the morning and clean your kitchen. I have to go now; I have to pick Taylor from the dentist. You know what the anaesthesia does to her and the last time she was alone a twat recorded her tumbling around and put it on youtube.”

 

“Andy it was you.”

 

“Shut up, asshole, everyone could have done it.”

 

“AS_Number1lml, could be anyone?”

 

“Fuck, the traffic is going to be horrible. See you later, man.”

 

Liam is left alone with his smothie, the rain hitting the ground and old James Bond movie playing in the background. If Louis were here they’ll talk about what did Pierce Brosnan had to give to the Devil so he could age that well so he could end up singing ABBA songs with Meryl Streep and Colin Firth in some Greek beaches. They would order in, have some beers and maybe Liam would have blow him in the couch. If Louis were here. If he hadn’t left and told him that lie over SKYPE. The mild irritation he felt since that Saturday transforms into raging anger and, two minutes later, when his phone starts ringing and the screen says is Louis he does something he thought he’ll never do.

 

He lets it ring.

 

When it stops, he gets a coat, his dogs and goes out in the rain.

 

Once he gets used to it its easy making his relationship with Louis missed phone calls and unanswered texts.

\--

_HEY, Liam, it’s me. I mean, it’s Louis. Is everything okay? It’s just… Jessica Jones is on Netflix, give me a call if you wanna watch it together, yeah? Okay, see you soon.”_

_\--_

_Hey, Li. What’s up? I tried calling you in the newspaper, but you must have a new intern because he couldn’t put me through. Eh, well, I just wanted to ask you if you wanted to get a beer with me tonight? Harry told me you’re really busy but come over, yeah? If you had a bad haircut I swear we won’t laugh at you. Well, Niall will laugh, but… just call me, please.”_

_\--_

_Liiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaaaaaaaaam. The fact that you’re not answering leads me to believe you’re either:_

_a)_ _Not at home_

_b)_ _Home but don’t want to talk to me, or_

_c)_ _Home, desperately want to talk to me, but trapped under your weights, I told you it’s a bad idea doing so much exercise._

_If it’s either a or c please call me back_

_\--_

_Hey, Li. I just wanted you to know that I’m leaving to Doncaster for the holidays. In case you called and no one answer. It’s not like you’re gonna call but I have my phone and you have my parents number. I’ll be back before new years anyways. Remember the play I told you about? We’re gonna premier on February, can you believe it? It’s amazing I’m really excited. Well in case we don’t see each other I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy new year. And… I just wished you would pick up the phone, you know? I would really like that, if you could just… pick up.”_

_\--_

 

Christmas in Doncaster is just like he remembers, boring and cold. His step dad puts on ridiculos Christmas sweaters; his younger sisters put mistletoe all over the place and his mom make him eat more turkey than a regular human should eat on a life time. Usually these are the moments he loves, spending time with his family, getting to know what his little sisters and brother are doing, how his mom is holding up.

 

This year the punch is insipid and he eats too much mashed potatoes, his family congratulates him for his play and when they put on ‘Love Actually’ and Lottie tells him ‘you love this movie!’ he runs to his room feeling like the worst human being on the planet.

 

Liam is still not answering his phone.

 

It’s pathetic, but he ends up calling Harry. 

 

“Louis?”

 

“I just want to talk to him, Harry. Can I just talk to him?”

 

There’s a long silence on the other side.

 

“He’ll get over it. Someday. I think.”

 

It’s not the most comforting thing he’s ever heard.

 

“Have you seen him lately?”

 

“A bit, he’s in Wolverhampton, right now.”

 

Wolverhampton, so close yet so far.

 

“Yeah, yeah.”

 

“He’s coming back for new years. Niall and I are throwing a party.”

 

Another long silence.

 

“You can come, if you want”

 

“Is Liam going alone?”

 

He doesn’t even know why he asks. Or maybe he does, whatever.

 

“Maybe you should ask yourself why it matter to you if he has a date, Louis.”

 

‘What do you mean by that… why do I care… of course I care’

 

Maybe the answer is not so simple.

 

\--

 

Christman in Wolverhampton has always been his favourite holiday. Every candy you can think of, Paynes feeding him day and night, playing with his nices and nephews, bad day television.

 

“Liam, son. Are you all right? You haven’t eaten the cake.”

 

“Mom, I took two pieces.”

 

“You haven’t even tried the syrup!”

 

“I’m okay, mom.”

 

He’s not okay. It’s no that his pride was hurt. The hot guy not wanting to be with him. He wishes it were that. He wishes he were mad. He wishes he were angry. This is not like with Olly, that sensation that he lost his footing. It’s not like that, at all. It’s just that, ‘Love Actually’ was on the TV and he wanted to call Louis and tell him that he doesn’t care that he’s like 12 in the movie; he wants to marry that boy. It’s that Christmas makes him feel melancholic and it’s a reminder of the things he doesn’t have and when he’s on his plane back to London he thinks on the reasons to come back home and neither one makes him exited. He has travelled to London many times but when he remembers the first time he did it he wants to cry because, goddam it, it’s isn’t Louis fault that he feels like a failure.

 

That’s when he gets his revelation.

 

He’s angry with himself.

_‘You had to go and fall in love with your best friend, huh?’_

He’s an idiot.

 

_‘You convince him that two guys who are attracted to guys can be friends but deep down you were hoping for more.’_

What a joke.

 

He asks for a double vodka bloody Mary, double tomato and plenty of pepper.

 

“Can you mix it all together, please?” He tells the stewardess. “I like it when they’re all together.”

 

When he gets home there a blinking light in his answer machine. When he hears Niall voice telling him to come to their New Year’s party he tells himself he’s not disappointed than he wasn’t expecting to hear other voice.

 

He’s never been all that good at lying to himself.

\--

 

Moving around in London at the end of the year is death wish and that’s his excuse for not coming out of his house since mid afternoon of the 29.

 

He decided to ignore Niall’s castration threat if he didn’t go to the party.

 

_(“Seriously, man, I think I ate something that was bad. Or maybe is the water in Doncaster, I don’t know. Thank you for inviting me but really I feel like crap.”_

_“Go tell you shitty excuses to someone who believes them, Tomlinson. I’m not gonna beg. You now where the party is happening. You’ll come if you like your cock where it is.”)_

He got supplies, of course, lots of beer and the best microwave food he could find. He has Orange is the New Black on the queue waiting for him and the curtains drawn and the volume way up so he doesn’t know what’s going on in the outside world.

 

Who wants to celebrate new years, really? If it were up to Louis there wouldn’t be any celebration at all. Every person who prays their gods or whatever are just going to be disappointed at the end of the year. Most people will be heartbroken, be fires or will have genital herpes. Or maybe everything at the same time.

 

Louis knows he’s being an obnoxious pessimistic bastard and being honest he doesn’t even care, because the only person who stopped him from being a pessimistic bastard is having the time of his life in their friends party, getting drunk, exchanging ‘happy new years’ and ‘I wish the best’ and he hasn’t returned any of his calls. It’s not like he cares, obviously. Whatever. He lived all this time without Liam, he can learn to live without him again, it’s not a big deal. After all he looked like a twat in that first trip the shared ten years ago. No one wants to be friend with a guy who looks like a twat. And that second time they saw each other in that plane when he was so exited about that Olly guy, his eyes shining with hope, how did that end up? With heartbreak and disappointment. Well Liam’s eyes shine for about everything, really. Batman movies. Good pastries. A well constructed story. Clear Sunday mornings when they can take the dogs out.

 

(He’ll call him first thing in the morning ’77 degrees, babe, get up!’ and made him put on his running shoes and promised him that if he broke his 15 kilometres mark he’ll let him stay taking care of the dogs while he get in line for breakfast, and Louis did it and then they’ll have muffins and tea and Liam will eat three muffins with a hundred different topings.)

 

Actually Liam’s eyes would shine for anything, with that kind of joy that you can’t fake and he’ll make the world a little better and made every new years eve that much bearable.

 

Louis has always thought that that Olly guy must have some kind of anomaly that made him a stupid asshole because Liam said ‘Olly wanted a career, being CEO and make his parents happy. And I wanted him to leave all of that for me’, you have to be the BIGGEST idiot in the fucking planet for not doing it, not giving everything for Liam. Liam with his stupid hair and his big hands and the birth mark on his neck and his stupid big ass heart that is bigger than his appetite, because Louis would do it, fuck yeah he would. Louis would give everything for Liam.

 

Louis would change his microwave food; Netflix and his stupid cynic way of living that haven’t brought anything but disappointment and hangovers.

 

He’ll change anything.

 

For Liam.

 

It takes him a moment to realize what just happened. Like five seconds. He gets up of the couch moves the curtains and looks outside, he feels like his heart is trying to get out of his chest.

 

“Oh.”

 

He sprint to his living room, gets the keys, wallet and phone and then starts running.

 

 

 


End file.
